this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2025
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okmatewanker

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No foul language - i.e. French ๐Ÿคฎ

Obviously satire, dozy wankers

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[โ€“] tiramichu@sh.itjust.works 61 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (3 children)

"Wanking" and "Gooning" have vastly different meanings, in their context and nuance.

Gooning is really about the visual stimulation, the content being viewed. You goon at or to something.

Wanking on the other hand (or with the same hand perhaps) is purely about the physical act of grabbing your cock and jerking it.

Besides that, there are more subtle differences. Gooning implies prolonged and leisurely, for example, while wanking does not.

You'd never say you had a "quick goon," but you could certainly say you had a "quick wank."

So don't worry, wanking isn't dying out any time soon.

EDIT: Added a handy reference table

Activity Type Visual Stimulation Duration Gender Neutral
Gooning Mental Required (Typically porn) Long Yes
Wanking Physical Optional Long OR Short No (Requires penis)
[โ€“] lurch@sh.itjust.works 29 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

when you write your scientific paper about it, pls also include edging

How about hand jobs? Tit jobs? Fleshlights?

A handy reference, indeed.

The study of linguistics never ceases to fascinate me.

[โ€“] Gork@sopuli.xyz 29 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Meanwhile the French are jacquing off

[โ€“] Alfredolin@sopuli.xyz 2 points 2 weeks ago

Why have I not read this sooner? My life is changed. This is genius. Banks hate it.

[โ€“] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Get wankpilled. I'm on my tossing arc, Britmaxxing.

[โ€“] flamingos@feddit.uk 18 points 2 weeks ago

Now this is a sentence a Victorian child would understand.

[โ€“] TheBat@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago

Like if your a REAL gooner

[โ€“] cyrano@lemmy.dbzer0.com 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[โ€“] parody@lemmings.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

lol perfect caption delivery

[โ€“] Kolanaki@pawb.social 16 points 2 weeks ago

The word "gooning" being replaced to mean jerking it is doing irreparable harm to the bad guy union of goons.

[โ€“] lena@gregtech.eu 12 points 2 weeks ago

okmategooner

[โ€“] TopsickPilgrim@lemmy.world 11 points 2 weeks ago

I thought gooning was when one takes wanking to a professional level.

[โ€“] 9point6@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

You Philistines need to learn nuance

A cheeky wank is worlds apart from a thorough goon

smh

[โ€“] dumbass@leminal.space 7 points 2 weeks ago

Hmmmm, tough decision, while I like the word wanker, that wankers telling me to save it and if he's telling me to do something, then it must be wrong.

[โ€“] apotheotic@beehaw.org 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Good lord pls can we get a CW or a NSFW blur on this motherfucker's face /j

[โ€“] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 2 points 2 weeks ago

Fun fact: there's a dent in his forehead you can see reflected in studio lighting sometimes. Allegedly, that dent is from the time Jeremy Clarkson punched him.

[โ€“] Blackmist@feddit.uk 5 points 2 weeks ago

I can't help feel the use of the word gooner to replace wanker is the result of a very long winded practical joke by Tottenham fans.

Yeah, even if not born and bred, I guess - we all are on this blessed day!

[โ€“] JohnSmith@feddit.uk 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Never mind gooning, I worry that the art of mooning is on the way out and will be lost.

wipe your.. face!

[โ€“] tacosanonymous@mander.xyz 2 points 2 weeks ago

If my a real wanker?

[โ€“] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 1 points 2 weeks ago

Iโ€™ve never heard anyone say โ€œgooningโ€.