this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2025
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[–] grue@lemmy.world 69 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] humanspiral@lemmy.ca 14 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

one spouse is more likely to cook potatoes if there are 2 or more available to enjoy them. Other spouse can cook some protein.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

fry fry grill grill fry fry grill grill

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[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

They don't like when you ask all the time, though. But sometimes they'll even put potatoes in dumplings for you. See if you can get one to do that for you. Add butter, bacon, sour cream. Mmm.

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[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 33 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Boil em, mash em, stick em up your arse

[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 32 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

While you may be able to derive some small amount of nutrition from boiled and mashed potatoes in your rectum, it's usually advisable to consume them through the other end, since starch digestion starts with salivary amylase.

If you'd rather consume the potatoes anally, it's advisable that you find someone to spit into your anus to help the digestive process.

Safety advice: please note that the mouth is lined in stratified squamous epithelium, which is better prepared to handle rough mechanical/chemical/biological stimuli than the simple columnar epithelium of the rectal ampulla. It is therefore advisable to ensure the mashed potatoes are sufficiently cool before uh ~~ingesting~~ ~~scooping~~ consuming.

[–] martinb@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 2 weeks ago

If I could upvote you twice...

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 weeks ago

Was fully expecting a hell in the cell ending to this post.

[–] MangioneDontMiss@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 weeks ago

I don't think we watched the same movie...

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 9 points 2 weeks ago

What for? Some "eat your wife" kink? :)

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

How good are potatoes though, right? Fuck I'm stoned.

[–] RebekahWSD@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago

They're so versatile and just plain delicious! I'm going to make some balsamic red potatoes tonight with dinner!

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

I'd be hard-pressed to remember having a bad potato. How often can you say that about anything in life?

[–] potoo22@programming.dev 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's why you marry someone who cooks lots of potatoes

[–] Flagstaff@programming.dev 6 points 2 weeks ago

Or you be the potato fiend!

[–] Velypso@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Starting to understand why my wife married me

[–] MangioneDontMiss@lemmy.ca 11 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] ZoopZeZoop@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

No, he has the Spudas Touch.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

He's hung like one.

[–] MangioneDontMiss@lemmy.ca 10 points 2 weeks ago

Potato industrial complex propaganda.

[–] Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

and bread! Don't forget eating bread happiness.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You may want to sit down for this.

[–] Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 3 points 2 weeks ago

I always thought that was just a name for the shape, but there really is potato’s in it. Best of both worlds.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Lived alone, eating basically low carb, greek style – not hungry for chips & snacks

Temporary back to mothers (farm, lots of pasta and potato and meat) – hungry for snacks, gaining weight.

[–] Dozzi92@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

This is a meme I can get behind. I would go to war for Big Potato.

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[–] arc99@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

Kind of weird to think that potatoes are a relatively modern cooking ingredient. Introduced to Europe from the new world, but even then a slow burner. The French had to be persuaded in the 1800s to think of them as anything but food for livestock.

[–] klu9@piefed.social 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

So that's why Irish novels are so cheerful!

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[–] lazycouchpotato@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

!potatoism@lemmy.world

[–] BlameTheAntifa@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

No poutine? What kind of Americentric nonsense is this?

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] BlameTheAntifa@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Yes, but the picture shows fries with ketchup when fries with gravy and cheese curds is objectively the best potato preparation ever dreamed by our species.

[–] AstaKask@lemmy.cafe 4 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Fuck carbs. Happiness comes from salads and meat. And my wife.

[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 14 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

You haven’t had my mashed potatoes though

It’s an additional thing that brings happiness

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 2 weeks ago

you use a ricer

[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)
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[–] Dozzi92@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I can't stand mashed potatoes made with a ricer. All about the mixer.

[–] Rekorse@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 weeks ago

Hand masher is bestest boy.

[–] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Those are whipped potatoes not mashed

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[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Case in point, you haven't had his wife either, so I'm on the fence on this one.

[–] gnutrino@programming.dev 3 points 2 weeks ago

I propose an experiment...

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[–] MissJinx@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

I said to my nieces "hapiness is like fire. Money, Lovers, Cars, Success... They are the sticks and logs. If you throw a log into a fire it will increase. But if there is no fire then it's just a pile of wood. You need even a little smal sparkle in you to be able to be happy with all the other stuff. If you have no sparkle, money and boyfriends are just a pile of wood"

Edit: sorry for any mistakes but I lost my glasses

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[–] GreenShimada@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

When my spouse is feeling down, potatoes solve all problems.

[–] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries.

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