this post was submitted on 06 Jan 2024
872 points (98.8% liked)

Programmer Humor

33529 readers
467 users here now

Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)

Rules:

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
AgreeableLandscape@lemmy.ml
cat_programmer@lemmy.ml
872
Thanks, TCP/IP (lemmy.today)
submitted 1 year ago by CmdrKeen to c/programmerhumor@lemmy.ml
31 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 
all 32 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 63 points 1 year ago (6 children)

UDP: Hold my beer.

[–] negativenull@lemm.ee 35 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Well, the packets start comin' and they don't stop comin'
Fed to the rules and I hit the cable runnin'

[–] sharkwellington@lemmy.world 36 points 1 year ago (1 children)

and they don't stop comin' and they don't stop comin' and they don't stop comin' and they don't stop comin'

-DDOS attacks

[–] Kelo@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Didn't make sense not to ping for fun

[–] HiddenLayer5@lemmy.ml 23 points 1 year ago

UDP: Throws beer in your general direction with no prior notice.

[–] embed_me@programming.dev 17 points 1 year ago

Or don't. I don't care. Anyway here's the bill

[–] c0mbatbag3l@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

I gave my best effort.

[–] Enzy@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

UPNP: I'm about to end this whole man's career

[–] PoolloverNathan@programming.dev 1 points 1 year ago

Universal Plug'n'Play?

[–] daBeans@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

beer proceeds to shatter on the ground

[–] Dlayknee@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

UDP: meh

[–] CmdrKeen 3 points 1 year ago

Here's another one, catch!

[–] Linkerbaan@lemmy.world 46 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Career prospects

[–] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 25 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Are they going to expand into Canada? That's a much better deal than getting reemed by Telus or Rogers.

[–] CanadaPlus@futurology.today 6 points 1 year ago

Yeah, no joke. That would be awesome, and they wouldn't be scared off by the paper terrorism.

When Mexico sends us us people, they're not sending their best. /s

[–] CmdrKeen 1 points 1 year ago

Damn, they must be charging an arm and a leg then, or your firstborn perhaps.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe 7 points 1 year ago

Wi-Fi protection racket has to be a new one, right?

[–] FishFace@lemmy.world 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If you're using TCP and losing packets you should be panicking though, because something is very wrong...

[–] thejml@lemm.ee 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

True, but TCP will just resend them, you won’t lose anything but some latency. Meaning it’s something to look into, but not something to panic about.

[–] wischi@programming.dev 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You can lose packets. Just cut the cable, but the other side will notice that the transmission is incomplete.

[–] FishFace@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Shouldn't the engineer be a bit more worried if the cable's been cut?

If UDP drops packets it's probably nothing. If TCP drops packets it's because something's actually wrong.

[–] PatFussy@lemm.ee 20 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Drug engineers

[–] shalva97@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Senior drug architect

[–] HiddenLayer5@lemmy.ml 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Drug scrum master

[–] synae@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 1 year ago

IT dealers

[–] devfuuu@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Sonic: gotta go QUIC.

[–] ipkpjersi@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago

Actually even a few dropped packets is too many in IT IMO lol

[–] cupcakezealot@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago

"you pee tcp? i pee urine" - chip ~ sales guy vs web dude

[–] br4b0@lemmy.eco.br 1 points 1 year ago

Hahahaha