this post was submitted on 09 Jan 2024
158 points (97.6% liked)

The Onion

4777 readers
722 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
all 14 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)
  1. Set appointment with your doctor.
  2. Go to appointment.
  3. Accept IV full of white shit.
  4. Wake up stoned as balls
  5. SO drives you home.

Easy money.

[–] Deceptichum@kbin.social 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] kogasa@programming.dev 1 points 1 year ago

You don't normally get general anaesthesia for a prostate exam? Do you at least get the lollipop afterwards

[–] qyron@sopuli.xyz 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I gotta get a twin monitor on a proper stand at least if I'm gonna get old on the internet I need luxury and style to do it

[–] BuddyTheBeefalo@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 year ago
[–] BaddDadd@lemmy.world -3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

He's gotta get "hyped up" for his prostate exam? WTF?? Just go to your doctor's appointment, bend over, and take it like a man.

[–] Death_Equity@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

He has anxiety and is worried that the bleeding hemorrhoids are colorectal cancer.