Microblog Memes

A plan is just a list of stuff to go wrong.

Hah, you can try to stay on top of it. But no matter how hard you try, there's always a chance of that one little mistake that turns into a cock-up cascade and leaves most of your squad dead and one remaining soldier trying to crawl to evac.

I love that game, but I'm probably a masochist.

It's also isometric and you can move units around the map to attack enemies.

I say it to my wife all the time. Was watching Friends with her last night and Chandler gets mad at Joey for telling Rachel he owns lotion. I looked at her and said, “Fellas, is it gay to moisturize?” It’s just so silly how many things aren’t MANLY™

Turns out it's just the man's equivalent of a coloring book

Played Civ 5 drunk with a friend once and it was amazing. At some point I ended up at war and realized a good few turns in that I forgot to make military units

Holy hell

I always liked C&C 3. JK Simmon, George Takei, and Tim Curry as the faction leaders. What more could you want?

I will always have fond memories of cheesing the hell out of the original C&C. My friend had it for DOS. I later got C&C Gold and could run it in Windows at 640x480! IIRC none of the cheeky bugs were fixed in the Windows port. You are a Command and Conquer veteran if you remember:

• Late game, deciding the hell with it and just swarming the enemy with ~500 bazooka dudes, because money was technically infinite on most maps, limited only by your patience. Every time the Tiberium tree "puffed" it would generate a little more green stuff you could harvest for cash.

• Penning the computer enemy into their base with walls, because their pathfinding was not smart enough to destroy objects in their way and they would never attack a wall (although sandbags would be crushed by tanks).

• Cherry-tapping your opponent by running over his last infantry dudes with your harvester, just to be an ass.

• Running a line of sandbags up to the enemy base, hovering the "sell" cursor one pixel off the edge of your own sandbags, but selling their building and keeping the cash. And preferably then parking a queued up defense tower at the end of the sandbag chain immediately afterwards.

• Baiting the computer into perpetually wasting their nukes or ion cannons by positioning one machine gun guy closer to their base than your own base or main forces, whereupon it would pathologically blow up just that one soldier because he was the "closest threat."

• "Yeah?" "Okay." "Yeah?" "Okay." "Yeah?" "Okay."

• Smuggling an engineer into the enemy's base under cover of some crazy diversion or another, inevitably aiming to nick his construction yard, undeploy it into an MCV, and bugger off with it. Or building MCV's with your friends in multiplayer and deliberately deploying them in each other's bases so you can build stuff from both sides and gang up on the computer with Obelisks and missile towers.

• Leaving the computer opponent with one useless building like a power plant left, so you don't technically "win" and can go on forever uncontested to see how many units you can build before your computer crashes.