The Onion

4698 readers

705 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago

MODERATORS

seahorse@midwest.social

pbrisgreat@midwest.social

284

Trump: When You're Feeling Low, Just Remember I'll Be Dead In About 15 Or 20 Years (theonion.com)

submitted 2 months ago by restingboredface@sh.itjust.works to c/theonion@midwest.social

34 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Thanks, Onion, that does make me feel better.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] just_another_person@lemmy.world 61 points 2 months ago (4 children)

I'll take action on under 5.

[–] A_Union_of_Kobolds@lemmy.world 27 points 2 months ago

Honestly, he's going downhill fast. Not that he was ever very uphill. But still, his faculties clearly aren't improving.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

days

[–] Norin@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I honestly don’t think he makes it to January.

[–] zabadoh@ani.social 31 points 2 months ago (2 children)

If there's anything worse than the words "President Trump" it's "President Vance"

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Would MAGA in the government and MAGA voters solidify around James Bowman*, or would they tear themselves apart trying to be Donald’s successor?

* MAGA don’t allow preferred names, right?

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Depends what the AM Radio Crowd tells them to do

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Will they all be able to stick to one script?

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Given how consolidated the market has become? I doubt Clear Channel has any trouble corralling their horses.

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Start spreading conspiracy that couchlover fed poison to orange turd.😶‍🌫️

[–] seahorse@midwest.social 5 points 2 months ago

Inshallah

[–] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 7 points 2 months ago

🙏🏻

[–] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

What are the odds on 4?