Why can't they just consciously recognize "I find them attractive and I totally would if they were up for it, but they aren't, and that's okay" and then let it go?

[–] fox@hexbear.net 24 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Or even just "this person is attractive but I'm not interested in changing our relationship"

[–] queermunist@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 day ago

Or even "this person is attractive and I would be interested in changing our relationship, but they aren't, and that's okay"

[–] Frogmanfromlake@hexbear.net 24 points 2 days ago

Because then their friends call them f-slurs and tell everyone they’re gay for not wanting to have wild sex with every attractive girl/woman they come across.

[–] Le_Wokisme@hexbear.net 14 points 2 days ago

that phrase is equivalent to "wanting sex", it's just the healthy expression of it because of all the extra words.

[–] Gosplan14_the_Third@hexbear.net 15 points 2 days ago

I doubt most incels make it to the actual rejection part.

[–] PKMKII@hexbear.net 26 points 2 days ago

Also self-defeating because if you never hang out with the opposite gender unless you’re trying to go for sexytime, you’re going to be bad at it. You need the low stakes experience first.