this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2025
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Just sucks wanting to/actually hanging out with someone 1 on 1 and there's silence and I worry they aren't having a good time with me. Then we bring another person in and everyone is talking a lot more and seem more comfortable. Why am I weird alone with people :/ tbh makes me very worried about dating or being in a relationship too. Even in a platonic friendship it makes me feel very anxious about what they think of me and our relationship. Like idk I like you I just don't have much to say but then suddenly do when there's more people?? I don't get it so how is anyone else going to

inb4 autism

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[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 2 points 1 week ago

I'm kinda like this. One on one, sometimes I have things planned to address but if I don't, the other person usually does most of the talking. In small groups I was fine though, and I usually sought out a situational medium for interaction instead of just talking.

Years ago, before I had dated anyone, I rehearsed saying the line "you'll either pull most of the weight conversationally, or you'll be okay with silence". To this day I'm usually the less talkative person, but if I get onto a subject I feel like talking about, I can go on for quite a while- until it runs out, and I'm back to "I have nothing to say" mode.