this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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(shamelessly stolen from an imgur dump)

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[–] SadTrain@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Too bad your clothes stay on the other side. I guess you can try to teleport out of county lockup too

[–] mosiacmango@lemm.ee 18 points 1 year ago

Cops dont even show up to actual crimes. Aint no one grabbing the naked dude blipping in and out of reality as they pass through walls.

[–] kibiz0r@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If your clothes stay behind, then what else does?

Dirt, dust, dead skin? Oils? Gut bacteria? Dental fillings? Food you just ate? Oxygen in your lungs? Oxygen in your blood? Implants for sure, right? What about hair, or nails?

I can imagine a scenario where someone tries this ability for the first time only to wind up naked, perfectly clean-shaven, bleeding profusely from every orifice and extremity, breathless and doubled over in pain, convulsing on a pile of shit, hair and other gross, getting their back sliced open by disembodied toenails.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

And do you swap places with matter at your destination or just fit your pieces around and into whatever is already there?

If you don't swap, you could end up with air in your blood stream and bacteria and fungal spores everywhere. And a chance of nuclear fusion depending on how close atoms end up to each other. And if it can fuck with things at a nuclear level, it will also fuck with them at a chemical and structural level.

Or if you do swap, it becomes a powerful weapon where you just pop into someone's body, putting the parts of them you overlap with where you used to be, then you just pop back out in a different spot. Bank vault door is too thick? Just teleport multiple times and you'll get through safely as long as you can remain pretty still while going through it. If you can constantly teleport a tiny distance, you might be impervious to all attacks because stuff would get swapped before it impacts you, but that "might" is doing a lot of lifting. Though you probably also wouldn't be able to hear sound, so you would be vulnerable when having conversations or listening to music.

[–] zeppo@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

What this comes down to is too few details. The fine print definitely matters