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So I.... Kinda fantasize about this like daily.
I think I'd be incredibly happy/relieved to know I can die without hurting my family too much as it wasnt by my own hand. At the moment I'm trapped here and I don't exactly want to be.
If your family would be upset to lose you, I imagine they love you and they would be upset no matter the way it happens. You might be trapped now, but life is long and full of opportunities. Luck is when preparation meets opportunity. Seek help, go to therapy, work on yourself and grab life by the balls. This humble stranger on the internet believes in you.