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How do you get white men at your org to shut the fuck up and make space for other people? (hexbear.net)

submitted 6 months ago by ButtBidet@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net

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I've had a few events so far where the discussion/feedback part had 1-2 white guys doing longgggg monologues about something unrelated to the main topic. Last time had some stoner guy ranting about the confusing service at airports here (the event was about Gaza). Before that it was some boomer guy trying to explain Madonna to the non-white teens in our group (the event was about trans rights). Sometimes it's just two white guys monologuing back and forth. It's super counter productive and cringe.

I'm just thinking of a hard rule. Like "if you're a white guy, you're welcome, but please try to listen more and keep unrelated monologues to a minimum."

For the record, I am a white dude.

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[–] D61@hexbear.net 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Find that CIA/FBI operations manual on how to disrupt orgs by using infiltrators and turncoats.

Print out and highlight the parts that talk about the specific actions of, nitpicking on specific but insignificant details and what is essentially filibustering.

Pass them around.

[–] blobjim@hexbear.net 14 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

passive-aggressive fedjacketing doesn't sound like a good idea

[–] D61@hexbear.net 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

They can be passive aggressive or aggressive aggressive about it.

If a person is doing a thing that is dodgy and nobody wants to directly confront them about it, maybe laying the groundwork for the offending person to do some self reflection will make it easier when somebody pushes back in a more direct manner.

Being an oxygen thief isn't a good idea either.

[–] Commiejones@hexbear.net 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Its not fedjacketing to say that certain behaviours are counter productive and that feds do them on purpose. If you keep doing counter productive things despite being told they are counter productive you are as useful to the org as any fed.

[–] blobjim@hexbear.net 3 points 6 months ago

But doing it passive-aggressively in response to someone doing something you don't like is.