chapotraphouse

This was something I posted just before the last megathread got unpinned, and I wanted to consider it a bit further:

In many parts of the internet, I often see “wholesome” posts and memes that say something vague and positive like “You are amazing!” or “You’re beautiful!” or “You’re valid!” My personal reaction to these posts is generally skepticism, partly because whoever posted it almost certainly didn’t have me in mind, and it’s a bit like if someone I’ve never met came up to me in real life and started praising and complimenting me – my first thought would be, “This person is being insincere and they probably want something from me” (which may be true in a sense, e.g. the person might want likes and comments on their post).

But I get the sense that this isn’t how most people feel about such posts. Which means that there’s something that everyone else gets out of such posts that I don’t, and there’s something about everyone else that I don’t understand. So, I ask with sincerity and the intention to understand, can anyone describe the value they get out of these general vaguely positive posts of affirmation?

The responses I got emphasized the importance of sincerity in the person expressing love for the audience of the message -- which, if the message is on the internet where everyone can see it, is potentially everyone in the world. Wanting the best for everyone in the world is a tall order.

And yeah, I guess that is a bit of a sticking point for me. It's easy to say "I love and wish the best for all people everywhere", but it's very difficult to practice it. So many people claim to love all living things in the universe one moment, and then go on the internet and tell people they don't like to kill themselves the next moment. If you say you "love" everyone, then in what sense do you "love" Donald Trump, Elon Musk, Joe Biden, Vaush, Kamala Harris, J.K. Rowling, Jeff Bezos, Pete Buttigieg, Jeffrey Epstein, Mike Cernovich, Andy Ngo, Ben Shapiro, Marjorie Taylor Greene, the woman who made the Giggle app, and everyone else whose existence makes you angry? I'm not saying it's impossible, but I do think it means you have to have have a deep answer to the question "What is love?" (an answer which goes beyond "Baby, don't hurt me").

There are few people I can think of who I think really have that kind of love for humanity, a love that's even capable of including the people listed above. As much of a cliche as it is, the first person who comes to mind is Mister Rogers, but I would also include certain activists such as Martin Luther King Jr or Leslie Feinberg. Like, if MLK said that he loves even the Marjorie Taylor Greenes of the world and wants to liberate them from the hatred they carry in their hearts, I'd believe him. But that's not just because of his words -- it's because his words were backed up by his actions.

I do think it's good to try to cultivate some kind of universal love for all humanity and all living things, but I wish people would be honest and acknowledge how difficult it is, and how often we fail at it. I'm an atheist, but this is one thing I've always found interesting about Christianity and the Christian individuals I respect most -- this idea of aiming to love everyone as Jesus did, but also acknowledging that we are all sinners who will fall short of godly perfection, and understanding that to practice this love is a lifelong challenge and not just something you can make a wholesome meme about and be done with it.

I'm not sure if I have a point. Maybe I'm just being way too solemn about the word "love", and maybe I'm taking internet posts too seriously for my own good.