this post was submitted on 23 May 2024
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You think people do that? Go on the internet and tell lies?

top 25 comments
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[–] whaleross@lemmy.world 81 points 5 months ago (1 children)

The Zuck has not been 36 since he shed his baby skin some 800 years ago.

[–] ptz@dubvee.org 19 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Didn't his people seed life on Earth millions of years ago then fuck off into space and eventually create the Xenomorphs?

[–] db2@lemmy.world 8 points 5 months ago

If so then he's the dudblood of the species.

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 59 points 5 months ago (3 children)

I also heard he likes to strangle kittens. But don't quote me on that.

[–] Darkard@lemmy.world 49 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I also heard he likes to strangle kittens.

  • Diplomjodler3
[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 20 points 5 months ago
[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 27 points 5 months ago (1 children)

"Don't quote me on that."

-Diplomjodler3

[–] Klear@lemmy.world 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

“Don’t quote me on that.”

-Diplomjodler3

- Michael Scott

[–] jaybone@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

You kill 100% of the kittens you don’t strangle.

[–] podperson@lemm.ee 1 points 5 months ago
[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 30 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Fake news. It wasn’t Covid, it was autoerotic asphyxiation.

[–] dmMeYourNudes@lemmynsfw.com 4 points 5 months ago

Get out of my head. Came here to say this

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 22 points 5 months ago

Don't give us hope

[–] Sabata11792@kbin.social 14 points 5 months ago

I'm happy that things around the world are improving, i am not one missed paycheck from death, and they used that giant fan to get rid of climate change...

[–] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 14 points 5 months ago (1 children)

They shipped his remains to his home planet Zorg.

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] jaybone@lemmy.world 2 points 5 months ago

He’s okay I guess.

[–] Mark12870@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

RIP Mark Zuckerberg †2020.

[–] bazus1@lemmy.world 10 points 5 months ago

Kinda makes me wish I had a facebook account to just go ham with fake "RIP Zuk" posts.

[–] cybersin@lemm.ee 6 points 5 months ago

"But, that would cost money!" - Zucc

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 5 points 5 months ago

Do androids get flesh diseases?

[–] MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world 4 points 5 months ago

I wish he were.