I did the math. Even at 3 meals a day a dog is not living that long.
this post was submitted on 28 May 2024
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64 year old dog?
Could it be Mr House's dog?
Dogs can live 25 years ish. That's 7-8 meals per day, which many dogs would gladly eat, but wouldn't be a healthy way to feed them.
😭
I did literally the exact same math & came to comment. 😆
listen, dog kibble is like, scientifically engineered and shit to give them a balanced diet full of all the nutrients every dog needs completely
if there were people kibble just like that i'd probably eat it too
and not just because i find puppygirls enthralling >////>;
Bachelor Chow. Now with flavor!
My recipe for bachelor chow:
- 1 can spam
- 1 can baked beans
- 2 cups cooked rice
Cube and pan-fry the spam, then dump it in a bowl with the other ingredients
Needs less salt and way more veggies.
It's a sometimes food
will this have the full nutritional profile my puppygirl needs
Flavor?! Whoa now let's not get carried away XD
Actually if anything they could upcharge for "flavor mods" designed to compliment the kibble...
(They're literally just like the powdered flavoring that comes with ramen though :p)
I dream with a human kibble too. The closest things I've found is Soylent and it's competitors.
I actually have quite enjoyed Soylent!
...
However, it's designed for people with normal metabolisms and digestive systems.
My metabolism is giga fucked forever and I've basically already consumed an entire lifetime's worth of carbohydrates. So carbs make me sick. Joint pain, inflammation, swelling in the extremities of my limbs, fatigue, trouble sleeping... I know it's carbs because these symptoms stop when I stop eating carbohydrates.
They're just really gods damned hard to avoid.
Sorry to hear that! But yeah, I enjoy it too. It took a couple of tries to get used to the soy flavor, but after that, it's great! If I'm too depressed or lazy to feed myself I can just make a glass of sweet vanilla-dlavored dystopian slop and that's it. It's great mixed with fruit and yogurt too.
Maybe i'm just not familiar enough with soy to identify it specifically but to me the stuff always tasted like ... I mean I guess kinda like the milk left after you finish a bowl of cereal except extra rich, with the consistency of a milk shake that melted. But it was definitely tasty though. When I was drinking it, at the time, I looked forward to it. Actually hit the spot. It was like my body could actually taste the vitamins it was fortified with, in a good way. It was the flavor of "I was missing something but I found it right here."
I think i'd like to look into if there are ketogenic versions. As much as I like Soylent, it'd have to be only on my cheat days, and my cheat days are reserved for more memorable experiences. A zero-carb nutritional baseline I can rely on would just be nice, y'know?
I make my own. Pasta and rice, some veggies, maybe a bit of protein thrown in. I like it because I can just shovel it into my mouth instead of having to cut or eat it in small bites.
Oh yeah! I've heard there is a really bigg DIY human kibble community too. But if u can barely feel myself, I'n definitely not functional enough to DIY it xD
I've been happy with Huels hot and savory pastas, the quinoa ones aren't as good in my opinion without doctoring them up with some extras. It takes a few tries to nail down how to scoop the proper amounts of powder and pasta from the bag, and then the amount of water to use, but once I did that, it's about as good as leftovers from a restaurant.
Pretty sure kibble is shit for their kidneys. Dry food isn't perfect for them obviously. For cats for instance a lot of cat food contains grains, which they shouldn't ever eat. Only the shittiest brands like Whiskas do that though.
It's designed to constipate them as well. You don't want your dog shitting 8 times a day.
Yup. The only dry food that is fine is 100% freeze dried meat / fish, but only as a treat, so again their kidneys don't take a huge hit. Cats usually don't like drinking water itself (they take in water from their killed prey usually) and feeding them anything dry makes them even more susceptible to kidney problems.
what if i just feed my cats soup
Well, obviously they need something of actual substance. But cat soups exist and are actually recommended like 3 times a week or so. I keep adding water to his foodbowl and he eats it up and drinks all the water usually, which is kind of like giving them a soup with meat chunks in it. He also has a seperate bowl for straight up water. One additional benefit from dunking it all in water, is it lasts longer, since wetfood tends to dry out really quickly.
Eh. Dog kibble is engineered to benefit the human. They should be eating a variety of fresh foods. Majority meat, organ, and a calcium source with some fresh vegetables thrown in for vitamins. Kibble is human laziness, capitalist “innovation,” and sacrificing our supposed beloved pets for our own convenience and to save money.
I am definitely in the minority here, but I can eat the same meal everyday for years.
Before I graduated college, I was overweight. I never got any attention from women, and all my friends thought I was nonathletic. I started waking up at 5:30AM everyday, running a few miles, and then showering before anyone else got up. But I wasn't seeing the results I wanted, because I hadn't changed my diet. So I started tracking exactly how much I was eating, and oh boy, everyone who's done that probably has a similar reaction e.g. "Holy shit I've been eating so much."
So I worked out a meal plan for myself. 500 calories of Steel-cut oatmeal in the morning, intermittent fast through lunch, then 1000 calorie dinner comprised of vegetable soup (add in some croutons and tobasco), turkey sandwiches (open faced for half the bread) with a bag of baby carrots. I use the baby carrots to help me pace the rest of the meal, basically, eat some baby carrots, then one sandwich, then some more baby carrots, then the next sandwich, then some more, then half the soup, then finish the baby carrots, finish the soup. The whole thing takes about 45 minutes to an hour to eat, and leaves me very full.
I've rotated out what kind of canned soup I use, as well as the accoutre-mount of sandwich add-ons (cheddar cheese with jalepeno vs. pepper-jack with banana pepper), but I've pretty much eaten this meal everyday since 2010.
Absolutely. I only tracked my calories for like two and a half months. A few years ago. Because of that I stopped buying nearly as much junk food, less sugary foods, less meat, switched to diet soda/flavored sparkling water etc. like oh my god, any food that involves a potato and oil has to be treated with the caution you'd give a moose.
For anyone trying to lose weight, a really good start is downloading a free calorie tracking app and track calories for just a few weeks. You don't have to change your diet, don't need to get on any plan or anything, just quantify what you're putting into your body and you'll develop a 5th sense at the grocery store for what kinds of things you need to limit.
Yup. I went years having tuna sandwiches for lunch.
It helps that I’m really uninspired by food, but if you don’t eat it you get weak and die so I relent and eat.
Hopefully that's in the past, because that's a lot of mercury you're getting having tuna daily. If not for the mercury concern I would probably do that myself though
Even in this context you're alternating between an oatmeal and a regular meal!
At three meals a day that's over 63 years
It's in dog years, honey, next!
so thats 69,420 dog days?
TIL I am a dog
Mine are picky little shits and like variety.
I have a friend who was very particularly about never letting his dogs have scraps of people food exactly to prevent them from becoming finicky. Made sense to me.
I give my dog people food but he still inhales kibble like it’s going out of style
Heh, try that with my dog. It can eat the same thing two times in a row and then refuses to eat more. If you don't offer anything else, it will not eat for days...
Second SpongeBob should be morbidly obese, lol
It would be dead
I mean a 40 years old cat or dog would be awesome
Bro speak for yourself I could go for a minestrone every day of my freaking life