Actively listen to what they're saying, talk to them, find something that's annoyed them. And figure out how they got annoyed? Figure out how they handled it. Are they being reasonable? You want to see the temperament of the person through what they say, and how they react. Most people will tell you who they are if you listen.
this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2023
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Do you speak English or should we do this in Spanish?
What is your name?
What is your date of birth?
What is your current mailing address?
Phone number?
Email?
What’s your annual net income?
What’s your social security number?
Do you prefer paper or electronic bank statements?
A great way to learn about someone's values is to ask what their pronouns are
"So, you into butt stuff?"
Man, who let the Reddit teens in?
“What are you looking forward to?”
Pretty open ended, it lets them talk about something that brings them joy, and it allows them to go as deep or shallow as they feel comfortable. Maybe they’re truly looking forward to their prick stepson graduating and leaving the house, but instead they can just say how they’re looking forward to fall, with the leaves changing colors and pumpkin spice lattes.
What’s the last book they read for pleasure, and would they recommend it.
- You can find out if they read.
- You can find out what they read (fiction, non-fiction).
- You might get a good recommendation!
I’ve used this question in the past as well, and got good responses. Most people know their favorite book, but the last one read is a little more varied and gives better insight into what they like.
What pieces of media influenced them the most.
It's tough finding a question inconsequential enough to avoid raising their defenses but meaningful enough to elicit a real, useful response
- "What is your biggest pet peeve that other people do?"
- "How would your friends/coworkers/SO describe you?"
- "What are you excited for?"
What do you like doing?
Where did you grow up is always nice. Not to go into details, but just to hear from what part of the world they are. There's always some interesting local stories people are interested in sharing.
At least.. whenever someone asks me where I'm from I always end up sharing a LOT of personal information.
"what do you geek out about?"
"if you could start up any hobby, what would you start doing?"
"when getting dressed and pulling your pants on... fasten zip, or zip fasten?" (if you know. you know.)
I felt old when the new colleagues did not know what a CRT was.
Do you have any siblings?
"What did you get up to today?" Then ask follow up questions about whatever they answer. You just need somewhere to start and you'll almost always find out something interesting.
I'll usually open a conversation asking about the weather. it's something that everyone has an opinion on.
Friendly?