this post was submitted on 20 Jul 2024
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A Boring Dystopia

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How low on avocado do you need to be to not be allowed to say that it's guac? 3.5% will certainly do it.

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[–] apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world 94 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] petenu@feddit.uk 23 points 1 month ago

Homeopathamole

[–] GratefullyGodless@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Seems more like sociopathic guac.

[–] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 84 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (6 children)

This got me curious so I looked up the nutrition page on Tesco's website... The two main ingredients are water and tomatoes lol

INGREDIENTS: Water, Tomato, Rapeseed Oil, Onion, Modified Maize Starch, Avocado (3.5%), Soured Cream (Milk) (3%), Lime Juice from Concentrate, Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Whey Powder (Milk), Sugar, Garlic Purée, Jalapeño Chilli (1%), Coriander Leaf, Dried Egg Yolk, Acidity Regulator (Citric Acid), Salt, Colours (Lutein, Copper Complexes of Chlorophyllins), Stabilisers (Xanthan Gum), Dried Red Pepper, Glucose Syrup, Preservative (Potassium Sorbate), Antioxidant (Ascorbic Acid).

[–] owatnext@lemmy.world 65 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Just like mother used to make.

[–] MeatsOfRage@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

Gather around children and enjoy some of mamas Tesco Guacamole inspired topping

[–] solsangraal@lemmy.zip 36 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (10 children)

at least they're up front about their bullshit. unlike "american cheese" that has "pasteurized processed cheese product" in fine print. or "ice cream" with "frozen dairy product" in fine print. when i worked at starbucks we had to call it a "chocolatey chip" frappuccino instead of "chocolate chip," because the ingredients didn't fit the legal definition of chocolate

i'm also impressed they called it "rapeseed oil" instead of canola oil. though maybe there are new rules about that

edit: ok, "canola oil" is a stupid americas thing--i withdraw my impressedness

[–] checkmymixtapeyo@lemmy.world 21 points 1 month ago (8 children)

Honestly not sure why people get so upset about American cheese. It's just cheese with an emulsifier in it that softens it. Best burger cheese by far.

[–] ForgotAboutDre@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

It’s less the emulsifier softens it, more it allows water to the added. Cheese is largely fat/oil which doesn’t mix easily with water.

The emulsifier allows you to melt and cast left over cheese, and add water to increase it’s volume. Its original invention was to make use of scrap cuts of cheese.

[–] tiefling@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Best burger cheese by far.

How can you possibly say such nonsense when swiss and muenster both exist

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[–] tiramichu@lemm.ee 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Hasn't it always been called rapeseed in the UK?

As I understand it, canola oil as a term is used predominantly only in the US and Canada, with canola itself being a portmanteau of Can -adian and Oil

[–] isVeryLoud@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

CANadian Oil, Low Acidity

Edit: apparently that's a myth? It's ola as in oil

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[–] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago

Here in the USA something that says "guacamole inspired" would for sure have zero percent avocado lol

[–] shutz@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Canola is a North American thing. AFAIK the British are familiar with the term "rapeseed" and don't need the rebranding.

[–] match@pawb.social 7 points 1 month ago

canola is a specific cultivar of rapeseed, regular rapeseed contains more erucic acid. there is no good reason for this because erucic acid has no proven health impacts on humans but they did it anyway

[–] Glowstick@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

I think that's the difference between UK law and US law

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[–] Xeroxchasechase@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)
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[–] anachronist@midwest.social 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Lets play spot the hidden corn syrup.

Modified Maize Starch

There it is!

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[–] lazylion_ca@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 month ago

That actually doesnt sound too bad. Though I'm surprised with the artificial colors that this is what went with.

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[–] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 51 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] TexNox@feddit.uk 6 points 1 month ago

I'm sure that's a farrow and ball paint colour.

[–] brbposting@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Can’t find the one where they added a fourth panel

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[–] BroBot9000@lemmy.world 38 points 1 month ago

“I can’t believe it’s not Guac”

[–] superkret@feddit.org 24 points 1 month ago

Finally, millenials' financial troubles are over!

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago

"I can't believe we're legally not allowed to call it guacamole"

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago

Reminds me of "fruit drink with natural flavors." Not actually juice, just juice adjacent.

[–] tiramichu@lemm.ee 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] everett@lemmy.ml 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Which are you not into? "Creamy" or "zesty"?

[–] tiramichu@lemm.ee 12 points 1 month ago
[–] qjkxbmwvz@startrek.website 10 points 1 month ago

I mean I drink oatmilk, and I think it'd be perfectly reasonable to say "milk-inspired drink," but yeah... looking at the ingredients I'd stick to guac or plain avocados, unless cash is real tight.

[–] avidamoeba@lemmy.ca 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I saw "tortilla chips with avocado", it had %0.04 dried avocado powder in it. So lower than that?

[–] cheese_greater@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

Anytime they say its "with" its like homeopathic level

[–] Pregnenolone@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The worst part of this is the lack of hyphen

[–] radicalautonomy@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

"Yeah I dunno, Jake...I was just this very moment enjoying this bomb-ass salsa when it hit me...this epiphany just washed over me...I think I want to be a power bottom."

pauses putting guac covered tortilla chip in mouth "...o...ohmigawd...you're not gonna believe this, Mike..."

Imitation tree fruit emulsion

[–] Tippon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How inspiring is guacamole?

[–] Zron@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

It inspires me everyday.

If guacamole didn’t exist, I wouldn’t want to get out of bed

[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

/shrug. Albeit with low expectations, I'd try it.

[–] Blackout@kbin.run 2 points 1 month ago

Not sure even British. Saw Tesco on an aboringdystopia post.

Yes.

[–] MisterFrog@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Props to them, though, for keeping equal text size for the title so it's not as easily mistaken for actually guacamole.

Edit: or rather pretty close in size

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