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"Our employees work an average 40 hour week"
Really? They work some weeks over 40 hours and other weeks below 40 hours? Because that's what "average" means. Or did you mean they work a minimum 40 hour week?
I actually asked a company this once and got no response.
isn't the CEO technically an employee? so if all the higher-ups work 2 hours per week (generously), it makes perfect sense
Average as in mode
Now I'm wondering what a green flag job ad looks like.
Here's the job.
We pay industry rates.
Clock out at 5.
Wash your hands after you pee.
I saw one great-looking job posting, it even listed all the professional skills I happen to have. Then I saw the company name: Palantir. GOD DAMN IT.
I kid you not, I'd take that job in a minute. Document every shady thing they do, drag them down, and collect a sizable paycheck. Until they realize I'm not doing shit and they get rid of me.
Them and Heritage need to be utterly destroyed.
The guys building the Death Star never had to worry about getting a call at 6pm on a friday.
That's how you know the job posting was a lie
also: included benefits.
We pay industry rates.
I'd go with "The salary is $X"
As long as you know exactly what to expect before going in, I think it's a pretty good sign. None of that "$X to $Y per hour depending on experience" where they will never hire anyone who asks for the higher end of that scale.
When can I start?
We went with abother candidate, soz
Thanks.
Nice.
Nice.
wash my...YOU ASK TOO MUCH OF ME. I QUIT!!
Fast paced - constantly shifting objectives that you will be tasked, thanklessly and endlessly, with accommodating outside of business hours while being given all the responsibility and blame for but your superiors get all the credit and pay.
Okay, but you've just described virtually every job listing. I could point to three, at a minimum, tied to my own job. And my job (at least after 20+ years in the workforce) is the best I've ever had.
So much of this is just HR code-speak for "We needed to put something in the advertisement and just cribbed from another ad we saw elsewhere."
It's agencies all the way down. By the time the actual job listing is written it's several levels of bureaucratic red tape away from anyone who knows what the actual damn job is. That's why they ask for 5 years of experience in a technology stack that's only existed for 2 months.
So much of this is just HR code-speak for "We needed to put something in the advertisement and just cribbed from another ad we saw elsewhere."
I wish HR would let the departments write their own job ads. Also, HR should be the last to see the applicant. Not the first.
Also, HR should be the last to see the applicant. Not the first.
Absolutely not.
My team opened up a position two weeks ago. Within the first 16 hours, we had seven hundred and forty nine applicants. Something like half of them didn't even meet the base requirements, let alone looked like decent options
Is that a joke? There's no fucking way me, or my team, or my manager, have any desire, or time, to sift through hundreds of resumes to fill a role. Even dealing with the few that make it through initial screenings is cumbersome.
As long as the base requirements are properly established by the team, and HR ought to be capable of filtering down to good-great candidates for any given position.
The legal department (if any) should be the last.
One of HR's primary duties is to filter out all the people who resume spam postings or who just don't qualify based on the requirements of the company or the hiring manager. When done, they give this resource of human candidates for the hiring manager to do their vetting.
As far as the job ads, a lot of it can be on a lazy hiring manager giving generic requirements or not reviewing/giving feedback on a posting. All it takes is a simple, "Hey, can you change that 'soldering experience' bullet to 'SMD rework experience (down to 0402)'?" If the position is union-based, what gets put on the ad is largely decided by the union along with the legal department to make sure it's all in line with the CBA.
Oh hey it's every tech job I've seen
oh hey it's at least half of all job listings i've seen
Isn't that the truth, how did this career devolve down to this level, all the effort it takes to be a developer and on top of that we have to deal with low ball offers and shitty work conditions
because anyone working with computers in some way is seemingly allergic to the concept of having boundaries and forming unions
They think they are too smart for unions
You know what has helped my stress and anxiety tremendously? Not giving a shit.
Yeah I tried that, worked hard for 8 hours and then closed my laptop, got laid off in 2 weeks
"Not giving a shit" is easier said than done. I am usually good at disconnecting from work after the day, but it also happened to me that work topics kept me awake at night. Not giving a shit isn't going to work when the consequences are waiting for you on the next day.
It also doesn't mean everyone around you becomes good at managing time or stress.
Eh, some of these aren't ret flags but literally just translate to "this is a corporate job." Rockstar and competitive salary just mean nothing, IMO. And flexible can be a green flag, but is totally up in the air which it is.
We’re like a family may also = nepotism.
I'm always amused whenever I see a company advertise itself as "family-owned". Every family-owned company I've ever worked for has been run by a competent but morally bankrupt founder and his dirt-stupid but morally bankrupt children.
My favorite one of these was a company that imploded because the founder was banging his son's wife (who was also the mother of his grandchildren). This was considered unremarkable in Louisiana.
Daughter-in-law
The only time I interviewed for a family run private business, the son was the CTO and paneled me with a rather downtrodden looking Indian dude who was the tech lead.
First thing out of the son's mouth: "I see on your resume you worked at AMD. They make hardware so why would they need you?".
Wdym?
Well you are a programmer.
I was stupified, and the tech lead had the exact same reaction Mike Myers had when Kanye said George Bush hated black people.
TIL
Been there done that (except perhaps the son's wife banging thing - that I know of). The founder desesperately wanted his son as the boss and his daughter as HR. Except the son was stupid and mean, and the daughter was a bit brighter but even more machiavellous. The son made only yes-men stay under him, the morale went down everywhere. The company went bankrupt shortly after I left. I was not unhappy about the outcome.
Nepotism is present in virtually every company, because it's usually cheaper and more reliable than hiring a random person. Depending on the position, the candidate may not even need to be qualified at all. So you just get your partner's cousin, who they are in constant contact with. They will do their best, because it's in their own best interest + if they fuck up, it'll be family drama for the next 3 years.
I'd say 90% of all job offers require either no specialized skills, or skills that can be easily learned in the first 3 months of the job. So it makes perfect sense to get a reliable family member, who then you can train and have an overall better employee, who is likely to stay at the company for longer. Furthermore, all the money you pay them stays in the family, so it's kind of like you haven't given anything away.
Fast Paced and Self Starter are things I actually jive with.
Fast paced is good stress for me, like I am being challenged. Self Starter means side quests and not being micro managed.
Your coworkers are like your family, exploit them
Thanks for the heads up! I'll apply to one of the other jobs
If they just straight up advertised the weekends I'd take it. Especially night shifts on weekends. More pay, I don't care about the day title, and more places open whenI have my weekend equivalent.
Eh, some people like at least a few of those things. My favorite jobs have been at startups where work-life balance was not a priority, but having a critical role in a small group of people working a lot to create something that you really care about is pretty great. (I do still expect either a good salary or equity.)
Lol grow up, no one gives a shit what you "create" at a startup and the owners of the company make the bulk of the profits off of your back, this is job not a hobby and you build crud apps not cure cancer
It actually was a cancer screening startup, and it went bankrupt so I made money while the owners didn't.
Are you creating something that you yourself or the other workers collectively own? Like, not just options, because that's another way to get fucked over later when the company gets sold for pennies on the dollar.
Because when my company got bought out by Microsoft about four years of my work got thrown in the trashcan. Not really fun spending four years working on something that gets shelved because Microsoft decided it would be better to prevent our product from going to market than be our customer.
That shit is only meaningful if you are actually making something you have control over. Don't kill yourself in a job that will drop you to do more stock buybacks. Jobs are for collecting a paycheck. That's all you're ever "creating" for yourself.
Remember that. You have no say in whether the product of your labor gets used or thrown in the trash for no reason. In most cases, you are making something that will be owned as a commodity by someone else that doesn't even know you exist. Hell, they likely don't even know the thing you're making exists.
Put in as much as you're willing to put in to keep the paycheck coming. Nothing more.
I usually like the many hats thing. If some of those hats suck? I just outwork the people around me and let them get stuck with the shit jobs.