When I was in high school I still had energy so I had many conversations with various varieties of theists. I remember a conversation that meandered to different topics, one of which involved the Westboro Baptist Church, and I actually made some sort of joke about figs.

The friend of mine had no idea what I was talking about.

I remember saying something like, "no it's like... canonically god hates figs." Because it's a funny joke and also true according to the Bible.

It would make a good story if my friend got all pissy about it but they didn't. It was more of an unsatisfying, "well I don't remember that part" because life isn't a movie.

But that story is so stupid (the Jesus one). I forget, it just fell on his head right? Nope I looked it up - HE WAS PISSED BECAUSE FIGS WEREN'T IN SEASON AND MAGIC CURSED IT.

I love that story because its not like he didn't like figs he just got pissed at that particular tree, and threw a god tantrum cuz he was hangry

Dude walks up to a fig tree when it's out of season, tries to get a fig from it, and instead of using his god magic to just make a fig he's just like "what the FUCK alright this tree sucks nobody eat from it anymore"

Spare some context for a fellow ?

Well there is no use of the f@g word in the bible anywhere anyway so, it's unlikely god or jesus would had anything to say about them at all. If the intent of the bible means anything, then we must treat everyone as we would want ourselves - and our figs - to be treated.

I love when these match up with dankchristianmemes