this post was submitted on 08 Mar 2024
17 points (100.0% liked)

askchapo

22931 readers
191 users here now

Ask Hexbear is the place to ask and answer ~~thought-provoking~~ questions.

Rules:

  1. Posts must ask a question.

  2. If the question asked is serious, answer seriously.

  3. Questions where you want to learn more about socialism are allowed, but questions in bad faith are not.

  4. Try !feedback@hexbear.net if you're having questions about regarding moderation, site policy, the site itself, development, volunteering or the mod team.

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS
 

It's lathe time baby lets-fucking-go

top 16 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

A ceasefire protestor stands up and starts chanting, Biden rips a fart but the strain causes his eyes to explode a gusher of blood that lands directly on the protestor and it's like xenomorph acid and it burns them alive. He then says he loves ice cream and his wife, Commander Biden.

[–] MaxOS@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Lol, god I hope his eyeball does that thing again.

[–] PorkrollPosadist@hexbear.net 6 points 1 year ago

how cool would it be if both of them did that?

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

like xenomorph acid and it burns them alive.

Not like a horny toad.

his eyes to explode a gusher of blood that lands directly on the protestor

Sort of like a horny toad. Seriously.

How Do Horned Lizards Shoot Blood from Their Eyes? | Wonderopolis

As a last resort, horned lizards may use one final defense mechanism that's particularly effective against predators like bobcats, wolves, and coyotes. They shoot blood from their eye sockets! This usually frightens predators enough to make them flee. Fortunately for humans, horned lizards rarely shoot blood at people.

[–] the_itsb@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Joe Biden is dead

Joe Bidet lives

a giant skibidi toilet arises from the podium, with Joe ~~Biden's~~ Bidet's head inside, spewing fresh water

edit: I earnestly want to make this an art installation in my yard, so cross your fingers for some mannequin heads and toilets on the side of the road when the students leave town in May

[–] Angel@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I just hope he addresses the issues of bofa, ligma, and sugma.

[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago

the Sugondese crisis is the crisis of our time

[–] cypherpunks@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes."

grill-broke

He isn't doing it hard enough! Outlaw Chyna and begin bombing in nanoseconds.... trump-moist

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

Earlier - Cookie Monster: "Me learn genocide. Me no like genocide. Genocide bad. Make Cooke Monster very sad.

This hour - Biden: "I'm making a surprise announcement in my speech tonight. Here it is... We are asking for Republican support to create a Democrat and Republican blue ribbon panel to investigate the politicization of Sesame Street." The president goes off script like his aides feared he would. "Children should not be exposed to toxic ideas at such a young age. They're just children for gosh sakes. Look, Israel has a right to defend itself..."

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

I don't know but I'm downloading season one of Designated Survivor.

I really am.

[–] JohnBrownNote@hexbear.net 3 points 1 year ago
[–] dayna@lemmygrad.ml 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Plz explain the lathe 😭

[–] GinAndJuche@hexbear.net 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It’s from a Le Guin work, Google “lathe of heaven”

[–] dayna@lemmygrad.ml 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] GinAndJuche@hexbear.net 3 points 1 year ago

You’re welcome comrade