chapotraphouse

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submitted 19 hours ago by BigLenin@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

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Me in my 30s: "my doctor says I need to eat nothing but kale and lukewarm water or I'll die at 50" deeper-sadness

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[–] Kaveros@hexbear.net 40 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

If plastics last forever, and I am full of microplastics, doesn't that mean I will last forever?

[–] lurker_supreme@hexbear.net 43 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Human consciousness is stored in the microplastics

[–] ImmortanStalin@lemmygrad.ml 11 points 15 hours ago

Nestle is just a NERV front.

[–] eldavi@lemmy.ml 13 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

maybe all the microplatics shielded him from all the cancers somehow.

[–] Dessa@hexbear.net 19 points 18 hours ago

"Mr. Burns, you are the sickest man in the United States” - but there are too many germs and they all cancel each other out."