this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2025
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I learned that my coworker was a lesbian three times before it stuck. What made it stick was during a talk she was having about LGBT issues, where she referenced how obviously gay she looks. I guess the short hair with bright dye was a tell-tale sign to other people. I just enjoy chatting with her, and that sort of thing just didn't come up very often.
This reminds me of a burn my wife gave to a random guy that decided to hit on her one day she was out running errands while I was taking care of the kids.
Deadass just first thing out of her mouth after he hit her with the "I won't tell if you won't," to her saying she's married. "Ew, I'm gonna need you to tell me what about any of this (gesturing to her entire Butch Lesbian look) made you believe I was straight so I can immediately remedy it." I almost felt bad for the guy for a second. Almost.
I have a not really a problem problem, I'm a straight dude that's into girls that have the "butch lesbian" look. I'm with my amazing partner now but before that I had something akin to your story happen twice!
Will no one think of the dudes into butch girls?!? /jk
To be fair, she was more disgusted by him responding that way to the "I'm married" thing than anything else.
Oh right, I totally missed that part. Yeah no means no and that's very fucked up. My bad.
Funnily enough, most of the butches I've encountered are bi 🤷♀️
"bi butch? so a bit- you know what maybe not"
My gaydar has been broken since the 80s. Whatever.
However it was calibrated before I can promise it's even worse now. I'm a straight dude. I'm a dudely dude. I dress like an extra on My Name is Earl. Other than crocheting and sewing my hobbies are all very "guy" hobbies. I'm currently sporting the worst mullet you've ever seen (it was a bet, ok?).
However, I get told with alarming regularity "I thought you were gay". I think it's because I'm friendly without trying to get in anyone's pants.
The mullet definitely would make me think you're queer!
Is that a thing now? I don't keep up. I'm ready to cut it clean again. Not because of any coded thing, but because it's hot as fuck. But I have to keep it a few more days, then I need to find the time to get it cut.
!crochet@lemmy.ca isn't very active. I haven't made anything in awhile either or I'd post something.
Good on you for not judging people by their looks.