this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2024
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traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

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[โ€“] frankfurt_schoolgirl@hexbear.net 21 points 5 months ago (2 children)

How do I know if im gay?

cw sex


I hooked up with a cis man for the first time since starting to transition. It's fair to say that he was a chaser lol, but kind of the best possible one. Like he's openly dated trans women previously, and he happily took me out in public before we did anything else (and paid even!). He wasn't excessively pushy and listened when i said I didn't want to do certain things. He was a bit older than me, but an objectively an attractive, athletic guy. Also he was very concerned with my pleasure when we actually fucked later on.

But, like, im not sure that enjoyed it very much. Like idk im not sure if i was actually attracted to him or really liked what we were doing. I think my favorite parts were cuddling before and talking after.

I've definitely been with other trans girls and not felt that way. Like I very much enjoyed the sex, and was extremely attracted to them.

Uh so maybe it was a sort of bad hookup but maybe Im a lesbian?

[โ€“] kristina@hexbear.net 15 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Definitely seems that way ๐Ÿค”

[โ€“] frankfurt_schoolgirl@hexbear.net 13 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Ok but maybe I just need more of an emotional connection what men instead of just doing it with somebody I've known for a week? Maybe then I'd actually want to see him naked?

[โ€“] Yor@hexbear.net 15 points 5 months ago

I guess being demi for just men is a possibility, but my outside read is that the only negative of that hook up story was him being a guy. there's always the possibility that he just wasn't your type tho

[โ€“] kristina@hexbear.net 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Yeah I generally had issues with small flings, I really didn't like them. Could be it thinking-about-it Kinda hard to tell in situations like that. Maybe some more cuddles?

You're probably right. I'm in my late 20s but sometimes i feel like a teenager because i lost so much time to dysphoria and dissociation. Maybe I need to take things slower and hooking up with like professional chasers is not the move. Not sure where I find men who want to go one cute dates with an awkward clocky trans girl but whatever.

[โ€“] rayne@hexbear.net 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Did he smell sexy to you? Pheromones are a major factor in sexual attraction. And there's very few men who are sexy to me.

And by very few I really mean my best friend from high school who had a huge crush on me while I was an egg. Now he's dating a trans woman.

[โ€“] frankfurt_schoolgirl@hexbear.net 10 points 5 months ago (1 children)

honestly i didn't really like how he smelled. which, not to be gross, but i definitely do like how women uh smell

Now he's dating a trans woman.

you definitely influenced that guy's life path lol

[โ€“] rayne@hexbear.net 9 points 5 months ago

We influenced each other :) he came out as bi and about a year later I came out as trans.

Honestly I'm more than a little jealous of his girlfriend. Especially as I'm having trouble with my own.

That said, him and I were roommates at one point. His cock is intimidating. And I'm really not into butt stuff to begin with. Especially not a cock that size.

If I had a pussy I might considerate it.