this post was submitted on 29 Jul 2024
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traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

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Sending good vibes to all of my trans comrades cat-trans

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[โ€“] Yor@hexbear.net 23 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (7 children)

kind of curious if the timeline of baby trans to trans elder is more influenced by time spent transitioning, hitting transition goals, or both thonk-trans

[โ€“] kristina@hexbear.net 19 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

Tbh its more of a state of being. Like if you are a major nexus for information dissemination you've become one

I've been in the community and transitioned for well over ten years but I haven't gotten all the surgeries I want

I'm a gigantic old-head though I got my trans info originally from a lady who had been transitioned for like 50 years in an irc that had like only ten people in it.

[โ€“] Yor@hexbear.net 17 points 3 months ago (2 children)

transitioned for 50 years is wild. shout out to her

[โ€“] kristina@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Yeah I hope she's still kicking ass, saved my dysphoria from getting way worse

[โ€“] Babs@hexbear.net 10 points 3 months ago

It's so eye-opening hearing about the shit our foremothers had to go through to get treatment. I thought RLE was bad, but damn we have gone such a long way in advocating for ourselves!

[โ€“] Eco@hexbear.net 13 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

in an lgbt support group i was in, there was a woman in her late 70s who had transitioned back in the 1980s. endless respect for her tbh

she was a lot of help for me early on, seeing a trans elder happy and just living life

[โ€“] Yor@hexbear.net 16 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I've been thinking about this since how I described my transition timeline feels all messed up now lol

it's become: 3 years of HRT/transition --> [two years of chaos post surgery] --> now in an era that should have been entering post transition, but I'm right back to the middle era again

that whiplash and justification for why I feel this way after 5 years transitioning is awkward to describe to people. I've met some new people recently and had to figure out how to navigate these conversations. I feel like I relate a lot to people earlier in their transition once again. weird vibes

[โ€“] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 17 points 3 months ago (2 children)

yeah I just feel like a baby trans even tho I've known I was trans for years and years and have taken some amount of hrt during that time.
Like I've been "in the community" (atleast online) longer than a lot of people have had their eggs cracked for, but they feel like they are farther along than me.

[โ€“] Seryph@lemmygrad.ml 15 points 3 months ago

Babytrans is a mindset

[โ€“] Yor@hexbear.net 11 points 3 months ago

even knowing that all transitions are ~ v a l i d ๐ŸŒˆโœจ ~ regardless of how long it takes, it's hard not to compare myself to others smh kril-stare

it'll all work out in time, for both of us I'm sure, but in the meantime it's frustrating

[โ€“] TerminalEncounter@hexbear.net 16 points 3 months ago

I think elderhood is something someone else/the community decides if you are or not.

[โ€“] magi@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I'm an elder in so far I'm close to a decade since starting hrt but i've known since I was around age 8 and I'm currently in limbo for a few more years at least.. I've been around the community in some capacity almost 13 years at this point. I've known some who transitioned start to finish and left in that time too..

[โ€“] Babs@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago

I think it's a community thing as well as an experience thing. Very contextual.

When I'm in a trans community of young people, I'm often the old lady who came out back when these whippersnappers were in elementary school. I have some knowledge and experience that can be helpful.

When I'm hanging out with cool old ladies at irl events who came out in the 90s, or my peers who came out in the 2000s, I definitely do not have that status.

Sometimes I withdraw from Trans Society, and then I'm just an old trans woman who has been out for a long time - it wouldn't feel right to call myself an "elder", even if I would be that in many contexts.

[โ€“] Seryph@lemmygrad.ml 12 points 3 months ago

I feel like both? And some people never really get to their elder stage.

[โ€“] EllenKelly@hexbear.net 2 points 3 months ago

By the time i found a community i was already an elder lol, i did all my embarrassing babyqueer shit in private for the most part, shockingly lonely. Wish I'd had more guidance from people that werent strangers offering bad advice online.