392
Tooth erections (lemmy.world)
top 36 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] PyroNeurosis@lemmy.blahaj.zone 61 points 1 week ago

"Mom, I'm not hungry!" "Honey, I can see you're hard. Just eat it."

[-] over_clox@lemmy.world 37 points 1 week ago

How do I delete someone else's comment?

๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ

[-] Alexstarfire@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

Yep, that's definitely porn.

[-] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 week ago

Weird Al's Eat It is even weirder than I remember

[-] SquirtleHermit@lemmy.world 39 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Well, if they only got hard when we were actually hungry, and not just "bored hungry", I assume the market for crunchy snack foods wouldn't be as prominent.

[-] cm0002@lemmy.world 34 points 1 week ago

Pfft as if we wouldn't have come out with a Viagra for teeth LMAO

[-] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

Well, this is horrifying. Just the thought of old men before Tooth Viagra comes out just trying to eat chips with their knobbly wobbly teeth.

[-] AddledGoat@lemmy.ca 24 points 1 week ago

There would be no change because I am always hungry.

[-] brlemworld@lemmy.world 22 points 1 week ago

Blowjobs would be even more enjoyable and have less risk of harm

[-] FrowingFostek@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago

Wouldn't this mean every blowjob would have to be on a full stomach?

If they get hungry while going down, do the teeth inflate like a balloon or, click up like a switch blade?

[-] Scubus@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 week ago

Does ur dick click up like a switchblade???

[-] over_clox@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Found the spitter...

[-] hark@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago

Doesn't saliva production increase in anticipation of food? Kinda like...

[-] over_clox@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

My teeth retract into my gums until I get hungry.

Yours don't?

[-] expatriado@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

mine retract when i go to the swimming pool

[-] over_clox@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

Shrinkage, SHRINKAGE!!!

[-] neo@lemy.lol 5 points 1 week ago

Only my fangs.

[-] klemptor@startrek.website 13 points 1 week ago

I can't decide if I love or hate this idea.

[-] neo@lemy.lol 5 points 1 week ago

Let me help you with an additional rule: horny and hungry hardening shall be coupled and only occur together or not at all.

[-] Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 week ago

"We're eating out for dinner tonight"

[-] klemptor@startrek.website 4 points 1 week ago

This calls for a pastrami sandwich.

[-] Zachariah@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago
[-] athairmor@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

Milkshakes would be a larger percentage of fast food sales.

[-] echodot@feddit.uk 1 points 1 week ago

Mcdonald's would be out of business then.

[-] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

It could be kinda nice to run your tongue over your squishy, deflated teeth between meals.

[-] paws@cyberpaws.lol 5 points 1 week ago

And cleaning them might involve some sort of tooth sucker device to suck them clean between meals for all the hard to reach places.

[-] spaghetti_hitchens@kbin.run 8 points 1 week ago

I'm gonna go suck my wife's teeth and see what her reaction is

[-] AngryishHumanoid@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

Then I would be hard all the time in more ways than one.

[-] kusivittula@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 week ago
[-] AngryishHumanoid@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Hey it still counts.

[-] taiyang@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

If it's one to one how we get erect normally, and as the human body essentially inflates using blood, your teeth would ultimately be blood sponges. Seems impractical.

Of course, take it a step farther and maybe physiologically the blood hardens to a sharp point. I know some fantasy settings where bloodstone is a thing, so I guess that. If it was possible, it'd look sick as fuck.

[-] Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Or maybe our teeth retract using that as a mechanism?

[-] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 4 points 1 week ago
[-] cinabongo@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

That is very relevant and hilarious ๐Ÿ˜

[-] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 2 points 1 week ago

I love Nigel and marmalade so much. I didn't think I'd like it at first, but it's my favorite shorts series

this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2024
392 points (97.6% liked)

Microblog Memes

4726 readers
3476 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS