A genuinely heartwarming greentext. Probably fake and gay, but heartwarming nonetheless.
this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2024
651 points (96.2% liked)
Greentext
4415 readers
1191 users here now
This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
- Anon is often crazy.
- Anon is often depressed.
- Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
As a gay, it's definitely gay. There's secret text that only gays can read. I can't tell you what it says or the ghost of Anderson Cooper will have me excommunicated from the gay Mafia, but it's there.
... I fear I've said too much already.
The gay agenda is keeping the secrets of 4chan from the normies confirmed.
The government already knew. Check out the documentary The Men Who Stare at Posts
ghost of Anderson Cooper
Are you people able to become ghosts even while you're alive? How do I learn this power??
By asking this question you have initiated the ancient ritual. Three spirits will visit you on the eve of national coming out day. You will have to blow them to gain your answers.
I think I know
@dharmacurious i am here to rescind your prostate
Noo! Not that! I've been good! It won't happen again!
While reading this text I definitely read some text. How do I know if that was the gay text or just a regular text?
Maybe if you're American... Seems like pretty fucking weird behavior to me.
Meh, pretty low on scale of weirdness. Pizza employees remember regulars well. Friends of mine are vegetarian and also have some specific exclusions because they don't like an ingredient. Each time she calls in now, when they hear her voice they immediately ask "vegetarian pizza with xx, without yyy, zzz, medium?" And all she says is "yup", confirms the address and it's ordered. Having a "quirky" guy call in with requests like these makes for a cool story you tell your new coworkers, a break in a busy day ("captain america called!") etc. At the end of the day you're not forced "to play the game" after all, you can just deliver and not interact.
Yep, worked pizza delivery throughout college. There are some people who just become part of the schedule. At my place we would do stuff like keep a clean pizza slicer and paddle ready to keep things halal for the Muslim couple who ordered every Thursday night.
We had a set up with a shut in that predated anyone's employment at the store. Every Friday as soon as we opened we would drop off 2 cheese pizzas at the porch and take the money left in the mail box. Never met the person, but they had a pretty sweet deal because they still only paid the price from like 6 years before because no one could ever get a hold of them. They just became kinda a store tradition.
We also had a couple of older regulars that we would literally call and check on if we hadn't heard from them in a while. This was nearly 20 years ago in a small college town, so things may be different now.
it's so weird to me that people get so much out of living in the country they were born in. I've lived in 5 countries, it's not that different.
Oh really? Sing all their national anthems
Most countries don't sing theirs during class each morning
Agree, only a few places around the world do that (America included in the mostly no)
Hello? Pizzahut? Yes this is hospital, your patriotic disc muncher is pretty mangled up over here. Please dispense calories
Could God create a story so gay that even he could not fake it?
Now tell me... Is the story fake, because it's gay, or is it gay... Because it's fake?
Yes.
Neither, they're perpendicular axes. It's just that every greentext is on the top right quadrant
Fake and stupidly nationalistic.
Ah so "fake and gay" is evolving lol
I don't understand, their phrase was identical to yours.
That seems pretty patronizing...
In both senses of the word!
I believe this green text implicitly, this actually happened, no proof needed.
Sorry, but... What an arsehole. Let poor people dance through stupid hoops to earn a lil extra. Fuck you, just tip or don't. You know? Like adults.
Nobody is forcing these people to take on the challenges. And clearly they enjoyed them enough to personally write a get well card.
Guess having fun isn't allowed anymore ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
You're feeling slightest bit of pleasure from an altruistic act, REEEEEEE!
What if I let homeless people dance for money?
Where does one draw the line?
Yeah there is no difference between a delivery guy who at least has a job and a choice vs a homeless guy with literally no choice if it comes down to survival. Its not that hard to draw a long when you are not a complete dumbass
Then they're busking, people have made a living doing that since at least medieval times.
Fact is, working for your money is effective even if you're begging. People are more likely to toss a dollar to a guy with a guitar or some other gimmick than they will to somebody just sitting there with a sign. Is it cruel, or gross? Maybe, yeah, a little bit. Extra sucks for the disabled homeless, I do understand that. But being a street performer is a legitimate job in some places. People will pay money for entertainment whether you're on TV or on the corner of 5th and MLK. If a homeless person wants to dance for a dollar I say let them. Begging for spare change is legitimately a competitive business. That can make the difference between getting food and a haircut or not.
So... That was basically my point. They're assholes. Tip or don't. Be it a beggar or whomever. Just because the majority acts like that, doesn't make it less asshole-y 😉
If that homeless person is delivering a pizza and willing to attempt a challenge, sure
Dunno if u know what those people make? I wouldn't even wanna wake up for that salary, of course they do your stupid things to double the hourly salary. They already deliver you your fucking food. I tip 50 bucks and that's it. I don't need their get-well-cards. It's a try to equalize things. A true thank-you that they're doing that shitty work so i don't have to.
MISTER BEEEEAAAASSSTTT
Ugh...
Dance monkey dance
I can believe it. Good pizza places will go the extra mile for good tipping regulars.
The local pizza delivery girl friended me on FB. I got excited because I thought she was cute and into me. Then I learned she's super right-wing and weird (in a bad way.). She became WAY less cute to me after that.
We also remember the regulars who don't tip, and we control how long your order takes, if we make a stop at a gas station (or home, or the weedman's) before or after we drop off, if your soda "got a little shook up" because we "had to slam on the breaks," and not only that but even less scrupulous drivers have say 10-15min alone with your order. Just a word of warning for those I've just described. Might want to tip or vary your stores up...
So how much was the hospital bill?
10 000 pizzas