this post was submitted on 02 Sep 2024
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Lord of the memes

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The Lord of the rings memes communitiy on Lemmy. Share memes about Lord of the rings and be respectful.

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[–] RootBeerGuy@discuss.tchncs.de 32 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Well what about the second peacekeeper? I think he doesn't know about the second peacekeeper.

[–] PugJesus@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

What about Trident? Minuteman?? Little Boy!?

[Aragorn-launched Davy Crockett hits Pippin in the face]

[–] jordanlund@lemmy.world 28 points 2 months ago (1 children)

"I don't think he's heard of Nuclear Winter, Pip."

[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

We've had one nuclear winter, yes, but what about the second nuclear winter?

[–] Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 3 points 2 months ago

Patrolling the Harad almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter

[–] Zagorath@aussie.zone 23 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I like the idea that it's the first thing that happens in chapter 1. Pippin uses the nuke before having been given any narrative reason to want to use it. Because he's just that kind of chaotic energy.

[–] RootBeerGuy@discuss.tchncs.de 9 points 2 months ago

Just in time before elevenses.

[–] rustydomino@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

Get the big one, Pip!

[–] CentrifugalChicken@lemm.ee 20 points 2 months ago

"We've had one yes, but what about second strike?"

[–] Azzu@lemm.ee 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Chapter 2: Mordor launched automatic retaliatory nukes at the rest of middle earth, all life in middle earth goes extinct.

Except dwarves, they have good bunkers.

[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Yeah but what about the Balrog? They'd have that to contend with.
And maybe... in fact I'd bet that creatures like Smaug could survive a nuclear blast even relatively nearby and probably even radioactive fallout, and just in case, they'd also know where every single cave in Middle Earth is, could quickly find cover before being exposed too much.

[–] CeruleanRuin@lemmings.world 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's more like "Pippin accidentally nukes Rivendell."

[–] HeavyRaptor@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 months ago

But somehow it turns out okay, like there was a huge invading army conquering it anyway and the elves have already evacuated.

[–] Dagnet@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago (2 children)

If you played the two towers LOTR game you would know that Legolas' bow is way better than any sniper rifle

[–] JohnDClay@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Even in the books he downed a distant nazgul solo.

[–] Dagnet@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

The only reason we get 3 books out of LOTR is because Legolas (and Gandalf) will it so. They could end the story at any moment but choose not to so others can have some fun

[–] PugJesus@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Excuse me, I played the Two Towers LOTR game and I learned that B+A+R was how Aragorn paused time whenever an orc attacked him to insta-kill it.

[–] Dagnet@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

As someone who mained Aragorn because my brother was playing only legolas (poor gimli), while we were pressing 3 buttons to kill a single guy, legolas was pressing a single button to shoot 2 arrows that PIERCED EVEN SHIELDS, killing at the very least 2 orcs before we can even see them and sometimes even more cause they pierced through them. Im not bitter at all, its perfectly normal to remember this 20 years later.

[–] Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Aragorn with Browning Automatic Rifle sounds about right. It was what Tolkien envisioned.

[–] AlexWIWA@lemmy.ml 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Lord of the Rings but Bilbo had a Low Orbit Ion Cannon.

[–] HeavyRaptor@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Bilbo is DDOSing Sauron? He won't be able to "influence" the orcs through Instagram.

[–] AlexWIWA@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 months ago

I was thinking GDI's, but he can use both

[–] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Cast your eye on this you glorified lighthouse.

[–] PugJesus@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Dark Lord receives a few cans of sunlight

[–] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 10 points 2 months ago

Pippen couldn't even handle a dragon firework. If he had access to a nuke he'd have leveled the Shire immediately.

[–] Catsrules@lemmy.ml 10 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Could the Ring survive a nuclear blast?

I am guessing yes.

[–] threelonmusketeers@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 months ago (4 children)

He's nuking Mordor though, not the Ring. Mordor wouldn't survive, but Sauron probably would survive, since his fate is tied to the Ring, which hasn't been destroyed. So Pippin didn't really do anything other than kill some orcs and trolls.

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 7 points 2 months ago

So basically the fireworks scene again, but on a slightly grander scale?

[–] Orangenkuchen@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It would would probably kick saurons time table a bit back

[–] threelonmusketeers@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Eh, for an immortal Maia, any delay is but a minor annoyance.

[–] nova_ad_vitum@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I know it isn't like this in the books but if you killed every single orc and glassed Mordor, and Sauron doesn't have a body and can't retake one without the ring...what's he going to do? Turn his shitty eye and shoot bad vibes at your forever? Just don't live near him (you glassed it anyways ). Pretty funny to think of Sauron still alive but utterly impotent because all his servants are dead and he's still disembodied.

[–] Catsrules@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Yeah but I am talking about nuking the ring itself. Like you mentioned Sauron is tied to the ring, and destroying the ring will kill him. Would a nuke take out the ring?

[–] threelonmusketeers@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Oh, I was working from your premise that the Ring could survive a nuke. If it can't, then Sauron is dies too.

I guess it depends on how the Ring can be destroyed. Is it purely a matter of temperature, or does Mount Doom have some extra special magic?

[–] Catsrules@lemmy.ml 2 points 2 months ago

My guess is there is some magic involved, but that is pure speculation on my part. Could just be temperature.

[–] frezik@midwest.social 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It was mentioned by Gandolf that there were no dragons left who had the fire to destroy the One Ring. Presumably, you just have to get it hot enough, and a nuclear bomb just might.

[–] Catsrules@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Oh that is a very interesting. I would think 100 million degrees celsius would be hotter then your average dragon.

[–] ccdfa@lemm.ee 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Unfortunately there are no dragons left who have the fire to test it :/

[–] Catsrules@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 months ago

Maybe they have some scientists/wizards who tested this and took some notes?

[–] Hupf@feddit.org 9 points 2 months ago

The NCD crossover I didn't know I needed

[–] absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Chapter One

Pippin commits a preemptive strike against a low grade threat. Thus becoming war criminal; the international community turns against The Shire as the dangerous loose cannons they have shown themselves to be.

The fact they are nuclear armed leads to years of protracted negotiations; extremely harsh sanctions and the economic ruin of The Shire.

The remains of Mordor; rise up and become far more important on the international stage. As the injured party they telegraph this into a much louder voice than they should command. They oppose the Elves but have similar goals, the control and subjugation of the humans.

[–] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 0 points 2 months ago

That's very antisemitic.

[–] guiguinofake@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Lord of the Rings but Gondor has the United States military-industrial complex

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 3 points 2 months ago

Well they definitely don't have universal healthcare then. Recovering from an orc battle must be egregiously expensive.

[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

How about sending some Terminators back in time to kill Sauron before he gains power?

[–] Dozzi92@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Problem is that Sauron looked dope as fuck, and terminators love looking badass, and so they'd immediately take his side. Number one rule of being a terminator is to always look cool.

[–] HeavyRaptor@lemmy.zip 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

But what about the poor orcs and their women and children who don't want to fight for Sauron but are forced to do so?

/s

[–] Jolteon@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 months ago

Silly raptor, everyone knows there aren't women in Lord of the rings.

[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

That's some Galaxy Brain Tolkien shit right there, man.