this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2024

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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

Anon is often crazy.
Anon is often depressed.
Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works

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Anon is SpongeBob (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 18 hours ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works

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[–] Skanky@lemmy.world 3 points 47 minutes ago

In before someone posts the green text story of a friendship of two straight dudes just being straight dudes having a good time blowing each other

[–] unknown1234_5@kbin.earth 7 points 1 hour ago

"hear me out man"

[–] selokichtli@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 hour ago

This is not gay. A cock was touched, even stroked, but there is no mention of the soap. Did it fell? Did someone pick it up?

[–] Jumi@lemmy.world 1 points 39 minutes ago

If touching dick is gay almost every man is a homosexual

[–] gil2455526@lemmy.eco.br 14 points 4 hours ago

Traumatize them back. Best revenge type.

[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 27 points 7 hours ago (2 children)

Tim is getting married at ~22?

[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 18 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

whats wrong with that?

[–] theonlytruescotsman@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

So much.

[–] wisely@feddit.org 3 points 26 minutes ago* (last edited 23 minutes ago)

My family all got married at age 16-18. I waited until age 22 and am still married nearly 20 years later while they are all divorced. Nothing wrong with waiting.

[–] weker01@sh.itjust.works 29 points 7 hours ago (14 children)

Is that strange where you are from?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 21 points 6 hours ago

Indeed. Here most people are still either getting their education or just starting with work.

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[–] jawa21@lemmy.sdf.org 51 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) (3 children)

Is it weird that the most unrelatable thing here for me is that SongeBob existed when anon was in high school?

Edit: a word

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 3 points 1 hour ago

This is where I remind you that 4chan has existed for over 21 years. Meaning that a kid born the day it started operation is now old enough to legally drink in the United States.

[–] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works 61 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

I'm over 30, SpongeBob existed when I was in middle school.

[–] jawa21@lemmy.sdf.org 18 points 10 hours ago (5 children)

Yeah, I'm over 40. SpongeBob didn't exist when I was in high school.

[–] expr@programming.dev 7 points 4 hours ago

SpongeBob first aired in 1999, so if you were born '81 or later, it was probably on when you were in high school. But yeah if you're in your mid-late 40s you would have just missed it.

[–] meep_launcher@lemm.ee 14 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Hmmm with this we can deduce that SpongeBob was created sometime after 40 year olds went to highschool but before 30 year olds went to highschool 🤔

[–] LateGreatHannibalLecter@lemmy.world 8 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

[–] meep_launcher@lemm.ee 2 points 3 hours ago

Welcome to Lemmy! If my comment is what inspired you to join I will be riding that high for a week

[–] CaptnNMorgan@lemmy.world 7 points 9 hours ago (2 children)

And you think it's weird that people under 40 are on the internet? I'm almost 30 and SpongeBob has been on since I was in daipers

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[–] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works 25 points 10 hours ago

Ahh, they must've whispered "no homo" before getting in the showers together!

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 114 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 15 hours ago) (1 children)

Fake: anon has a friend

Gay: literally gay

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 9 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Fake because Brad didn't get gay with Tim and anon

[–] festnt@sh.itjust.works 4 points 6 hours ago

fake because tim is marrying a girl

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