In the dumbest timeline our future Mad Max style hellscape will be dominated by those who control the eggs rather than oil and gas.
We must prepare our bodies for the Thunderdome. Thunderdome is the new law!
this post was submitted on 04 Feb 2025
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The Four Horsemen will be .... the Egg Man .... the Flour Man ... the Yeast Man ... all held together in an alliance with 'Oven Man'
Don't forget the toilet paper man.
What about the Walrus?
The masks and biohacks alone will be brilliant!
Who has the ability to fence 100K eggs before they go bad?
"I got a guy for that"
The guy:
Waffle house
In the news today:
https://www.cnn.com/2025/02/04/food/waffle-house-egg-surcharge/index.html
Waffle House is placing a surcharge on every egg it sells
“The continuing egg shortage caused by HPAI (bird flu) has caused a dramatic increase in egg prices,” Waffle House said in the statement to CNN. “Customers and restaurants are being forced to make difficult decisions.”
Lol, "difficult decisions."
This sounds like a line from Trailer Park Boys
Someone who already has a buyer, most likely an industry.
Bro I got hard boiled, cage-free, and century. I can get my hands on Balut but it’ll take a couple days, and it’ll cost you.
Give em to the poor
This is America. Those eggs are going to the black market.
I wonder if this was before or after they wash the eggs. AFAIK they last longer and can be left unrefrigerated before they're washed
Maybe start marking eggs with some kind of dye pattern to make it harder.
You underestimate how many deviled eggs I can eat.
I had actually thought about this sort of scenario happening, and wondered the same about a week ago. My conclusion was freeze drying to make powdered eggs that can be shelf stable for years.
Also might end up with a serious market for that as prices continue to climb with no end in sight.
Last I bought powdered egg prior to this recent skyrocketing, it was about a dollar per egg in equivalence. I don't know what it is now, but I'm sure that will go up too.
(I use powdered egg for baking because I just don't go through eggs enough to justify buying fresh. I actually save money by not having to throw away unused product)
That'll help the price go down...
Depends: in the most likely case, where the thief is someone who's trying to exploit the crisis to make a quick buck (just like Big Egg are), your sarcasm is accurate.
In the unlikely, but not impossible, scenario of this being an act of Robin Hood style vigilantism, though, this could indeed make the price go down as a bunch of struggling people suddenly get free eggs..
I can't wait to buy black market eggs!
So we are stealing eggs, now? What have we become...
My sweetest hen.
Everyone I know
fries some eggs in the end
And you can't eat them all! My empire of eggs
I won't undercook
I will make you eggs
YES!
A dystopian anti-intellectual society ruled by tech oligarchs.
Buy a gun.
I bet it was one of those criminal gangs from across the border we’ve been hearing so much about. We gotta send more troops to protect Pennsylvania.
In other news, my store is having a 50% off sale on eggs! Everything must go!
So millions of dollars worth
Joking aside, it was about $40k worth of eggs.
Huh, near me a dozen eggs is $9.50, so close to $80k worth of eggs at retail prices.
I need to put a lock on my chicken coup at this rate.
100k eggs about to go bad.
You'd have to try to sell to stores and restaurant chains. ~~I'm guestimating that's 28 pallets of eggs.~~ Googling says 8640 eggs per pallet, so 11.5 pallets.
It’s egg farmers trying to increase the price even further.
That's one big omlette.
Lol.
Get ready to see a lot more of this.
Burn them
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