This is fucking genius.
Love it
this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2025
1186 points (98.9% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
31036 readers
3667 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
So is that “fuck” or “marry” for this one? Unless you mean “love to death,” in which case is this a “kill” for you?
I feel I'm missing something then. Anyone care to explain? (I know about the couch thing, that its his wife in the middle, and that the pope died after he visited him).
There is a game called “fuck, marry, kill” where you’re given a list of three people and you have to choose to fuck one, marry another, and kill the third. For example: Trump, Vance, and Putin… which would you choose to fuck, marry, or kill?
Ah I see. Thanks.
Answer the question!
I'll fuck, kill and then marry Vance.
Interesting choice! It breaks the rules, obviously, but they're made to be broken.
I think you're sleeping on the marry/kill combo with two oligarchs on the list but I respect it anyways.
always fun to see a bit of lighthearted necropsy
load more comments
(1 replies)
You're my favorite writer. Happy to see you're still alive!
This joke is in the context of the game fuck marry kill (I’ve also heard it as kiss kill marry)
Basically it’s a fun social game (highly dependent on your group) of who’d you have a one stand with, who’d be your better half, and who’d you’d erase from existence
TLDR, it’s from a social game
He's a homosectional
I would nominate this for this year's meme awards.
That would be a fun thing to have. Monthly or whatever meme awards
Nobody thought about that earlier? We should do an instance about it or something. I'd do it, but after 2 years I still don't know how the fediverse works.
It's easy to set up. We could team up. I'll do the comm if you want to help put together the posts.
And we will call them Memys. You know, like Emmys, but with two letters switched. There should probably go a statuette with it, like the Emmy statuette but with the figure holding a well known meme. First that comes to mind is the doge dog, but that has been soiled. Got any ideas on that?
Maybe a cellphone? Sitting on a toilet
noice
I'm surprised I don't hear more about his wife.
Why don't we piss off his base more by mentioning his brown wife?
Because his true love is the couch. He actually killed the pope, because he wouldn't let him marry the couch.
vance was granted a one-time touch of death by thiel to use on the pope.
DEI wife.
She's a beard. He's really Peter Theil's fuckboy, and everybody knows it, but they pretend they don't, so nobody wants to ask too many questions.
Usha Vance to Kamala Harris: "See this babe, you can't get into the White House on your own. You gotta ride some hillbilly dick for that."
a hillbilly who has better makeup.
load more comments
(5 replies)
What's the couch story?
Just a joke because it's fun to call him a couch fucker. He never fucked any couches as far as we know.
....as far as we know.
He hasn't provided any evidence to the contrary, so technically he still fucks couches.
"Guilty even if proven innocent" IS standard US government policy now, after all!
load more comments
(4 replies)
As if you guys would have made different choices
I'd marry the Pope, because the Pope marrying a guy would have hilarious fallout, kill the couch because recliners are superior, and... ahh, damn... guess I gotta take one for the team...
the Pope marrying a guy would have hilarious fallout
just wait.. he's gonna come back any day now, as a wooman
I respect these choices. Peak chaos shitposting energy
If the couch was brown the answers would be way different.
What a pretty beard in the middle!
Thank you for this!
view more: next ›