this post was submitted on 06 May 2025
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Wizards

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[–] arotrios@lemmy.world 21 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Someone needs to go back to the Arcane University and retake Enchantment 101:

[–] MacNCheezus 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Or pay more attention in potions class and brew up some sort of love elixir...

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago

Lust potion. We aren't looking for lifetime attachments like some kind of warlock.

[–] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I feel like wizards are much better with their hands, what with all those somatic components. Sure, a barbarian can thrust hard and pick you up, but a wizard can do some unreal things with his hands and tongue.

Also mage hand definitely get used for weird sex stuff.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 3 days ago (2 children)

what about warlocks and eldrich blast?

[–] meyotch@slrpnk.net 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Yeah, I was just going to say that the definition of a warlock is just a wizard who manages to get laid.

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Some of us manage to get laid without selling ourselves to an eldritch horror.

[–] meyotch@slrpnk.net 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It’s more of a rental type situation.

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

I'm not getting roped into another time-share scheme, thanks.

[–] jjjalljs@ttrpg.network 2 points 3 days ago

I don't think you can use Eldritch blast for sex stuff, not even with the push/pull effects, because the damage would kill people too easily

[–] vrighter@discuss.tchncs.de 14 points 3 days ago

he puts on his robe and wizard hat...

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Disregard wenches, ponder orbs.

[–] MacNCheezus 2 points 2 days ago

Why not both?

[–] Spacehooks@reddthat.com 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Yall ever try physical enhancement?

[–] MacNCheezus 2 points 2 days ago

Unfortunately the most effective potions for that are all banned by the wizarding council.

[–] normalexit@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] MacNCheezus 2 points 3 days ago

I didn't know wizard gangsta rap was a thing but now I want more