askchapo

I just voted for Biden and in so doing became black

I saw a white woman getting executed for making spaghetti tacos back in 2017

This but unironically

i became trans

Have you tried not being w*ite ?

I survive on mayonnaise sandwiches, gefilte fish, and anger in my panic room.

Im running out of mayonnaise

Easy. I'm not white since my great-grandmother was Irish.

All I want to do is listen to Limp Bizkiit again and put on something, anything with the under armor logo.

I was getting through it by using a completely unproblematic stage makeup tradition but then the secret police found a Mumford & Sons vinyl during a surprise inspection and they took me away

God I wish

I don’t leave the house, never log off, and never. Stop. Posting.

I thought I wasn't supposed to endorse the Burgerland Junta???

i became a woman

Yeah, it's real tough for us out there these days. The nice thing about being white though is it provides great camouflage during the winter. You just gotta strip nekkid for 3 months a year and the PC Police will never find you. You're on your own the other 9 mos., but that's a 1/4 of your life figured out right there.

A couple nights ago I was hiding in some bushes, trying to stay out of sight of the drone sweeps, and as I sat there, thinking about the last time I'd seen any of my bros (it was nearly a year ago, we were crouched in a ditch when a patrol car came past playing Toploader's cover of Dancing in the Moonlight just as it got to the chorus and I... I couldn't stop him) when suddenly I seemed to see in a clearing ahead of me the first white cishet male face I'd seen in months, and sitting in front of a lavish feast to boot. I felt tears forming in my eyes, though I sucked them back in because I wanted to make the right first impression on this stranger - and to that end, started limbering up my shaking-hand - and began to approach when I realised that he, and the enormous pile of unseasoned chicken and light beers before him, were sitting underneath a giant wooden box held up on one side by a stick with rope tied around it. On even closer inspection, and after adjusting my "fish fear me" hat's visor out of my eyes and taking off my wraparound sunglasses, I saw he was actually just a paper plate with a face drawn on in ketchup, stuck to a mannequin wearing an UnderArmour shirt and shorts and a silver vintage Casio and boat shoes. Putting this information together, I realized I had nearly fallen into a cunning trap, so I started cautiously and tactically maneuvering away, but just as I did so I heard from a bush across the way what must have been someone's ringtone going off and being suddenly silenced, though not before I recognized the first few seconds of the chorus of Flamingo by Kero Kero Bonito.

Heart pounding, I fled as quickly as I could into the night, weeping freely now I knew I would be unobserved, my unshaken hand clenched in rage... in short, the struggle to survive continues.

By rounding up and submitting 12 other white people per day to be processed in my stead. (Also being a postal employee)