this post was submitted on 08 Mar 2024
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"You see, we're trying to deliver so much aid that we ran out of parachutes!"
"So, using our incredible American innovation, we decided, y'know with all that food we're dropping, people are going to need cutlery."
"So we looked into it, and our case history indicated 100% survivability of using forks, knives, and spoons as a parachute. We even packed an honest-to-God anvil, I don't understand why, but they claimed it was necessary and we always Follow The Science!"