I’m so scared for the future and it feels hopeless.
I’m afraid to talk to my friends and family about how bad my mental health is right now because I don’t want them to try to hospitalize me or something.
I just feel like I’ve already experienced the best moments in my life and all I have to look forward to is being a wage slave, debt, and dying alone.
I know that I need to have some kind of purpose to dedicate myself to but I don’t want to do anything. I get so drained from work that I spend all my time off playing video games or watching TV just to recharge so I can make it through the work week. It just feels like a pointless cycle where I work so I can afford treats to make it bearable to work.
My job isn’t even difficult, and it’s remote and pays really well. But it’s so pointless. It’s honestly sickening how much harder people work to actually benefit society for not even half as much. I’m aware that I’m extremely privileged in this regard, but that also makes me feel even more hopeless. If living is this uncomfortable for me, so many more people must feel even worse.
Recently, I’ve been thinking about how scary it will be to get old. My husband is a little older than me and doesn’t take great care of himself, so most likely he will die first. It’s very unlikely that we will have children, and also I think it’s gross to have kids just so you could have caretakers. My siblings are also older. I’m scared to be senile living alone or being abused in a nursing home. I guess it’s possible that we’ll all die a lot younger due to climate change.
I feel like the only things keeping me going are the fear of pain from dying and how my dogs and husband depend on me. I feel like if there was a button I could press to be instantly painlessly dead, I would push it (maybe I should move to Canada?).
I know that my problems are small compared to a lot of people here, and I’m sorry if this post comes across as insensitive. I feel like I just had to get these thoughts out of my head and I really love and appreciate this community. Thank you for listening.
The 1932 election had a communist option, it’s unlikely that there will be one on my ballot.
We’re not going to overthrow fascism in America at the voting booth. I’m not trying to convince anyone to vote for Biden, that’s his job and he’s not doing it very well. I’m also not going to shame anyone for doing something easy like voting in the hopes that it makes them a tiny bit safer.
I would shame someone if they thought that voting democrat is a step towards bringing about positive change or parroted some bullshit about how we can get more concessions from Democrats than Republicans. If voting is the extent of your political engagement, you aren’t opposing fascism.