Got told my book was "very successful at what it was doing" and that while an editor might demand changes, the reader didn't see anything they would personally change
Feels fucking good folks
Poogona
joined 3 years ago
fuuuuuuuuck I have a "meeting" with an industry guy about my book in less than an hour
I don't know what any of this is, all of my mental preparation has failed me
ELON MUSK YOUR ELDEN RING BUILD WAS THE WORK OF AN INCOMPETENT
Moods like this always tell me I need escape
Not like escape from my problems (though that would of course be nice), but escape from me. That stagnant routine becomes a welcome backbone to my day-to-day when I'm really ensconced in something, be it a piece of media or a creative project of my own. Even just a couple hours of being so mentally involved in something that my awareness of myself melts away is deeply restorative. Maybe your depression doesn't stem from boredom like mine did (I think) but if it does, a little time in the flow state usually does the trick
Edit: this is very therapist-tone and I don't like it, so I want to also say something chummy and shitposty like "keep existing to enjoy the days Kissinger can't"
There's something truly pitiable about people like this who are seeking this level of control over something as inevitable as mortality.
Sometimes I wish humans had more of the dimorphism these essentialist types seem to believe in, that way I could have a big red dewlap or colorful plumage
Honestly I'm gonna assume this is what's gonna happen
It would be by far the stupidest possible future, and that means it's most likely
Wow now that you mention it this is a pretty serious absence
His bones are earth
His flesh is dust
His breath is wind
Hobbies might have some kind of internal "source" but they also need to be nurtured. You can't love what you don't know, you know? I have a bunch of weird interests now and each of them began with not much more than a sort of mental double-take that served as a starting point. Like the question "what is squid ink made out of anyway?" can be the start of an interest in marine biology.
Depression makes it very hard to catch these little moments since it smothers that little mote of curiosity and pleasure that can be the start of a passion.
I don't like calling it maladaptive daydreaming tbh but that might be because I write
Daydreaming keeps the communication lines between your conscious and subconscious healthy. Honestly, allowing myself to do it while also actively critiquing why some motif or "scene" comes back to me repeatedly has been extremely helpful for storytelling since it has a way of helping me fill the gap between event A and B in a plotline