this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2024
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[–] Ranvier@sopuli.xyz 212 points 3 months ago (12 children)

"Google, nobody called from Google. One of the things like doing a show like yours, your show, you know, you see it on Fox, but when you really see it is all over the place, they take clips of your show that you're doing right now with me and if I do a good job, they're gonna vote for me, they're gonna vote for me because it's not just on Fox, it's on Fox is a smaller part of it. You're on all over this, those little beautiful cell phones you're on, you're all over the place. You have a product, you have a great product. You have a great brand. So you have to get out, you have to get out, you have to do things like your show and other shows and Google has been very bad. They've been very irresponsible and I have a feeling that Google is gonna be close to shut down"

Can anyone help? I don't have a senile narcissist to English translator!

[–] baldingpudenda@lemmy.world 109 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I'll take a stab at it.

I do these shows and everyone wants to see it. It goes viral and everyone looks it up on Google to watch on their phones. But Google is doing something to block it, so if I win I'm going to shut them down.

[–] TexasDrunk@lemmy.world 18 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Ok, it's scary how easily you seemed to have done that. I kept getting caught up in the beautiful devices and couldn't figure it out.

Hats off to you, friend.

[–] baldingpudenda@lemmy.world 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

For donny you have to analyze like non native speaker or child. Who, what, where, when, and why. Also everything is either positive/negative for him.

He mentions Google, it's bad.

Him doing interviews on shows, good, the best.

Fox, good show

people on phones; good tech

trying to watch him, good. obvious see above

Google close down; veiled threat. Constantly does this, mob talk. "It would be a shame if something happened to your establishment." He also did it when he called Georgia secretary of state to find him more votes. He brought up his daughter, beautiful daughter. You want to do the right thing for her.

[–] nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They should have charged him the minute he stepped out of the White House.

[–] frunch@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

Coulda woulda shoulda. Now we get to see if he's gonna be president for 4 more years 🫠 wtf is this ridiculous timeline

[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 8 points 3 months ago

Oh.

He’s threatening to use the government to harm them unless they feed his ego/help his campaign.

I guess he’s been spoiled by Twitter and Truth Social fawning over him and wants that from everywhere.

[–] Blackout@kbin.run 56 points 3 months ago (1 children)

All I could find was a jabba the hutt translator:

"Google, nobody called tuta google. Wompa of doe things like doing do show like yours, do show, u know, u stuka it on fox, but whao u really stuka it sa all over doe pa, they take clips of do show da u're doing right ateema gee je um if mee do do good job, they're gonna vote che je, they're gonna vote che je because soong nopa just on fox, soong on fox sa do smaller part of it. U're on all over this, those little beautiful cell phones u're on, u're all over doe pa. U have do product, u have do grancha product. U have do grancha brand. So u have tah pushee, u have tah pushee, u have tah do things like do show um other shows um google has been ree goola. They've been ree irresponsible um mee have do feeling da google sa gonna be close tah shut down"

[–] BarbecueCowboy@lemmy.world 30 points 3 months ago

Wow, I don't know what it is, but that actually made it a bit easier.

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 32 points 3 months ago

Google isn’t kissing my ass and making me look good by constantly placing only the good things about me at the top of search results and videos.

So Google sucks and I’m going to shut them down.

[–] ReallyActuallyFrankenstein@lemmynsfw.com 26 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

"I want all the attention. I want everyone to have to look at me all the time on their phones. Give me that attention. Gimme! Gimme! Attention is like a McDonald's burger with fries. I want all the attention. Google, make that happen, make people watch me on their phones. Or I'm going to shut you down."

[–] ThePowerOfGeek@lemmy.world 22 points 3 months ago

I know he's always been prone to kind of incoherent rambling, and quotes straight from his rallies are usually stream-of-consciousness walls of text like this. But it really seems like it's getting worse over time. Not sure if it's senility or drug addiction or stress or whatever else, but Trump really seems to be unraveling.

[–] tortina_original@lemmy.world 19 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Does he really speak like that? 😳

[–] Coelacanth@feddit.nu 40 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Is this your first exposure to Trump?

[–] tortina_original@lemmy.world 9 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

Not in the news. But I am not American, I don't watch what Trump has to say (or rather, I barely watch news for years).

Years ago I used to hear him talk while he was president and it was really cringe but this transcript from the first reply just seems a bit surreal. Insane, rather.

Edit: I was curious enough to go visit the article URL and take a look at the video but there doesn't seem to be a video of the Fox clip they write about (or ublock/etc hide it). Maybe it's for the best... 😁

[–] phdepressed@sh.itjust.works 12 points 3 months ago

It's for the best. Listening to him makes you lose iq points. If he talks about anything you know about it is also likely to make you angry.

[–] TheBananaKing@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

His speeches caused serious headaches for translators the world over. How exactly do you translate his incoherent ramblings into another language?

[–] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 6 points 3 months ago

Crap, I hope they've been vaccinated at least.

[–] Ranvier@sopuli.xyz 28 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

Yes this is the direct quote the article refers to. He rambles nonsense, often self contradicting, and then people in the media try to fashion it into coherent points for him, leading to a fake impression of competency, misleading the public and voters. This is the man who had to have his national security briefings summarized into a few brief bullet points with pictures, and he was apparently still unable to read them.

[–] timbuck2themoon@sh.itjust.works 8 points 3 months ago

Exactly. He should be block quoted more often and never given the benefit of the doubt. It's incoherent bullshit.

[–] aStonedSanta@lemm.ee 2 points 3 months ago

He also charted a hurricane with a sharpie! Usually we ask the children not to draw on the adults things but alas…

[–] SteveFromMySpace@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Look, having nuclear — my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes, OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart — you know, if you're a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if, like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say I'm one of the smartest people anywhere in the world — it's true! — but when you're a conservative Republican they try — oh, do they do a number — that's why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went there, went there, did this, built a fortune — you know I have to give my like credentials all the time, because we're a little disadvantaged — but you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers me — it would have been so easy, and it's not as important as these lives are — nuclear is so powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of what's going to happen and he was right, who would have thought? — but when you look at what's going on with the four prisoners — now it used to be three, now it's four — but when it was three and even now, I would have said it's all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because, you know, they don't, they haven't figured that the women are smarter right now than the men, so, you know, it's gonna take them about another 150 years — but the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us, this is horrible."

From snopes (which has more info on it for the curious)

[–] tiefling@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

Even ChatGPT is confused

The text seems to convey a few disjointed points:

  1. No Call from Google: It starts by mentioning that no one called from Google, but this point is unclear and not elaborated on.

  2. Importance of Media Exposure: The speaker emphasizes that doing shows like the one being discussed is important because these shows are widely seen, not just on Fox but everywhere through clips shared on cell phones and other platforms.

  3. Effect on Voting: The speaker believes that a good performance on the show will positively influence people to vote for them.

  4. Reach of the Show: The speaker highlights that the show is not limited to Fox but is widely distributed and accessible, thus amplifying its impact.

  5. Praise for the Show: The speaker compliments the show's product and brand, suggesting it has great reach and quality.

  6. Need for Exposure: There's an emphasis on the need to be active and appear on various shows to maximize exposure.

  7. Criticism of Google: The speaker criticizes Google for being irresponsible and suggests that the company might be close to shutting down, although this point is vague and unsubstantiated.

Overall, the rant is an unfocused mix of praising media exposure, expressing a belief in the power of TV appearances to influence voters, and criticizing Google.

To make things worse, I also asked it to Yodaify it

Called from Google, nobody did. Doing a show like yours, yes, on Fox you see it. But everywhere, really, it is. Clips of your show they take, with me right now, doing it you are. Do a good job, I must, for vote for me, they will. On Fox alone, it is not, smaller part Fox is. All over this, you are. On those little beautiful cell phones, you are. A great product, you have. A great brand, you have. Out you must get, out you must get. Things like your show, and other shows, do you must. Very bad Google has been, very irresponsible. Close to shutting down, Google is, a feeling I have.

[–] frezik@midwest.social 13 points 3 months ago

LOL at "a few disjointed points". Whatever else you might say about ChatGPT, its output is extraordinarily polite. Saying "a few disjointed points" is practically the equivalent of "what the fuck is this drivel you fed me?"

[–] captainWhatsHisName@lemm.ee 2 points 3 months ago

Yeah ChatGPT didn’t seem to realize he’s praising/condemning google not Fox. He’s attempting to get google to roll over and lie for him like Facebook does

[–] SteveFromMySpace@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)
[–] Rubisco@slrpnk.net 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] SteveFromMySpace@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] Rubisco@slrpnk.net 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Cheers! If it hadn't taken slightly longer to load, I might not have noticed.

[–] Sabata11792@ani.social 11 points 3 months ago

Old man yells at cloud for not paying protection money.

[–] JonEFive@midwest.social 9 points 3 months ago

It never ceases to amaze me how they mock Joe for speaking gibberish but then this seems to make complete sense to them.

[–] PoopDelivery@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I kinda thought he was saying Google, probably meaning YouTube, shows Fox content and people aren't tuning in on the TV anymore, and his dumb ass thinks Fox is losing money and viewers.

There is no way he'd destroy Google with all that yummy data he could gobble up and share with his shitbag acquaintances.

[–] Ranvier@sopuli.xyz 2 points 3 months ago

Trying to decipher his words is like dementia astrology, who knows. If he doesn't know what he's talking about, we surely can't either.

[–] Plopp@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago