this post was submitted on 03 May 2025
506 points (99.6% liked)

The Onion

5995 readers
115 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I’m researching how to sneak a Komodo dragon into RFK’s bedroom so it will eat him while he sleeps.

[–] SabinStargem 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Komodo hunt by biting a limb, then waiting for the target to die from infected wounds after several days. No restful sleep for RFK, not until the moment is nigh.

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

The komodo bacteria will have to compete with all the weird shit that's already in his body though. So it's not a sure thing.