Hello everyone~ The megathread is very eepy this week so I am being very quiet and not posting a whole essay as that might disturb their rest. The megathread does a lot of work for us after all, so they deserve to rest a little. Our regularly scheduled effortposts will continue next week.
Nonetheless, I hope that you (yes you!) are doing well, whenever it may be that you happen to be dropping in. I wish you all the best~
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I know the EXACT day my egg cracked, I remember what I was doing too! It was new years day lol, auspicious!
I know exactly when my egg cracked (a year ago today), but it took me a little bit for me to actually accept it. I actually consider you to be the single most influential person to me coming around to accepting myself as quick as I did. All of those silly little questions I was asking a year ago that you always had the answers for. I'm pretty sure I've thanked you before, but really, thank you.
Also I have no fucking clue who you were, or even if you're still around, but whoever it was that said "wake up babe, new girl just dropped" when I changed my pronouns in tracha to she/her as an experiment when I was still trying to figure shit out, I fuckin' think about that moment so often. That silly little thing gave me SO much gender euphoria it almost made me cry.
egg crack story time
I actually cracked my egg twice. Well I guess one was a fissure haha. Like two years or something ago I was up super super late and I think I saw a YouTube video or something that got me thinking if maybe I wanted to be a girl. I was really sleep deprived and it was a whole thing. I remember immediately messaging my sister this BOOK long series of messages that were basically "these are all the reasons I think I might wanna be a girl but I dunno I don't hate being a guy so maybe it's not even worth it." It takes me ages to fall asleep because at that point maybe being trans was all I could think about. I wake up the next morning with some level of lucidity and immediately message my sister "nvm lol" ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ so anyway I shoved that deep down within me for like a year and never thought about it. A year ago today, again, I stayed up super late, way later than normal, and I saw a transmasc meme. And I heard myself think in real time, "valid ofc, but why anyone would actually want to be a guy is personally beyond me" and in that moment my eyes bugged out and I said out loud "oh shit." I vowed that I was going to get to the bottom of this this time and laid in my bed for a good 30-45 mins just repeating to myself "he him she her they them he him she her they them" to over and over again trying to figure out if there was one set I felt more inclined towards. I got absolutely nowhere with that method lol. So I reached out to my sister again. Basically did the whole thing again where I said "these are the reasons I might want to be a girl and with that being said, just as an experiment, can you use she/her pronouns for me?" And I didn't even need her to respond. Just the act of asking her and feeling the excitement of the thought of her actually doing it was enough for me to kinda just know deep down. It's why I think today is the best day I could choose for my girl bday. Because even though it took me a while to accept it after this, this was the moment I knew there wasn't any turning back.