this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2024
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Do I actually need a gender label? What if I just didn't have one?? There is a tiny part of me that longs for the rigid structure of the "woman" box, and I could still very roughly fit that, but also my authentic self does not really fit that box, so.
i never cared for labels on anything, really. sometimes i feel like i'm faking the "transgender woman" label even though i tick basically every box you could think of that would define a trans woman. labels suck
I have always used "transgender lesbian" instead because the romantic attraction end of my identity is way easier to square! I realised I haven't really declared myself "woman" since I got on hormones basically...
mood. I use "bisexual" and "lesbian" pretty interchangeably for myself. but I find it also really, really hard to call myself a woman with this much testosterone in me.
LETS FUCKIN GOOOOOOOOOOOOO
hyped for you!
You really don't. Or you can define for yourself what that label means. That's the entire point of queer people using terms to self describe, it's a means to take control over our lifes and how they should be understood. When you feel that trans woman is a useful term for you, but not in the established way, you can redefine it. When you realize that it does not help you understand your needs and wishes, when it's just a tag they put on you to classify and catalog a specimen, when it does not resonate with you, you do not need that label. It's not a prerequisite for using she / her pronouns and a woman's first name, it's not a prerequisite for wearing a dress, it's not a prerequisite for wanting HRT and laser hair removal and bottom surgery. You're entitled to all of that stuff if that's what you need, and if you need that is something only you can decide correctly.
Forgive my autism for causing me to view labels as static and monolithic :) I definitely do not resonate that much with "woman", it's fine and I'm happy enough if that's what someone called me, but does it fit my noodly gremlin ass? Idk, I might search out a new label or I might just leave it. Autistic Asexual Lesbian, gender: Mysterious & Vague!!!
As I have said before I think my kid-brain just conflated them because I didn't wanna be a man, so I must be woman! I had no idea there were more than two genders. Looking at it now, I feel no distress having taken hormones for a decade and been fulltime presenting as me just as long while not identifying with "woman". I feel weirdly relaxed without it, which is cool. A decade later and I am still learning about me โจ
yes! i feel the same way.
Kind of a funny feelin :)