He's more machine than man now. The universe tried to end this heartless bastard by ending his heart. Then fallable man and the corrupt underlords made him a reinforced pacemaker so no one could emf the fucker. Then bought his way to the front of the line / 
heart transplants from his victims.
this post was submitted on 11 Jul 2024
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chapotraphouse
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The good die young
Dick Cheney if he were anyone else would be dead but he has access to a rather unique combination of billionaire wealth, US govt executive branch VIP privileges, deep military industrial connections, and access to bleeding edge DARPA tech. Guy literally holds the world record for time spent living without a heart. Spent something like a year without one. The resources and expertise expended on keeping him alive have been ridiculous.
I don't believe the soul resides in the physical heart, but it does say a lot that we have a former vice president who was heartless in literally every sense of the word.
Like that's some cliche writing right there.
bro had his first heart attack at 37, lmao
Having smoked approximately 3 packs of cigarettes per day for nearly 20 years, Cheney had his first of five heart attacks on June 18, 1978, at age 37.
I know people smoked more back then, but shit
IIRC, the canonical james bond of the ian fleming novels smoked like 70 cigarettes a day...
idk, 3 packs was a seriously light day when i was a smoker
i think this one is just gonna depend on what kind of scene you're in tbh
I've never smoked myself so I have no idea how much is considered a lot, and three packs sounded like a lot to me 
it actually probably is on average, i think i'm just being annoying
like realistically if each one of those cigarettes takes you 3-5 minutes to smoke you're spending hours a day smoking, which is pretty much only attainable if you're going out every single night or you're someone whose job is to sit in meeting rooms and get plastered all day
NANOMACHINES!
Guy literally holds the world record for time spent living without a heart.
Confirmed: Dick Cheney made a phylactery
Thank Obama for giving all former presidents, past and present, indefinite secret service protection until death. Otherwise most of these people would be chilling with like 1 security guard and someone could’ve done something funny by now. But luckily other people in the government don’t get that privilege. The lawyer who wrote the torture memos is currently teaching law at Berkley lol
probably some rite with a bunch of fucked up components, i wouldn't worry about it
Blood transfusions from African children and genome therapy can do wonders just look at Kissinger
I wanna but they won’t let me anywhere near the cemetery to get a good look
Spoiler alert he ain't dead
He's only 2 years older than Biden