Probably Galactus cause he'd probably make me a herald like Silver surfer with lots of galactic powers; if it has to be confined to Earth, then most likely Lex Luthor for the employment benefits, and if I'm feeling anti-imperialist, either Doctor doom or Black Adam (cause DC and Marvel heroes need to stop being servants of empire and leave foreign nations alone)
this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2024
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What's the screening process for being a silver surfer type galacrua scout?
Well, for one, can you surface?
I'm taking Poison Ivy off the table.
nooooooo
Magneto then ig I'm trans so I'm basically a mutant anyway 
Dr doom, normal government paper pushing
Yeah, this'd be my go to. Why deal with all the other bs when you could have a stable public sector job?
Magneto, but he's not a bad guy.
Second choice maybe... Taskmaster? He doesn't do really terrible things, he has decent powers and doesn't seem to draw the ire of folks like Punisher.
I bet taskmaster's gym benefits are amazing.
Rhas 'al Gul. He's the accelerationist option, plus I get to be a cool ninja
(disclaimer I'm talking about Liam Neeson Rhas, I know almost nothing about his comic book counterpart)
Pronounce his name different every time you see him
Ask every day if the league of shadows cafeteria is serving Rhas 'Al Goulash for lunch.
Regin'ald Gouling.
Magneto. Dr. Doom is a very close second place, but I've always had a deeper kinship with Magneto
I don't read much in the way of comics and have an extremely limited knowledge of their villains but...
Since All Roads exists I can pick Benny from FO:NV, right?
Pros:
- All you're expected to do is lounge around a casino and say things like, "ring-a ding ding, baby." and "I ain't no fink, you dig." Which is a bit of a lighter workload than hauling boxes in a warehouse/dock while waiting to be beat up by batman. Some of them perform on stage but thankfully that seems to be optional.
Cons:
-
With all the bright lights, loud noises and people, a casino would probably be the worst place for me to spend any significant amount of time. I could probably angle for a gig guarding one of the quieter bits though.
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I get a bit of a misogynist vibe from the Chairmen.
Doctor Octopus
I don't know if this guy hires goons or anything, but I get the impression he's really hands on with the gooning. While some may find that a source of stress, (the boss will see your fuck ups first hand), I think it'd be reassuring to know that the spandex twats are gonna be angling for his dick not yours so you're relatively safe for a goon.
Too late, I areadly work for Ivy. You can see me in hit docu-drama "Harely Quinn" portraying myself.
the flag smashers 
Non grim-dark version of Riddler.
Like, outside of a few heavies for personal bodyguards what's the rest of his henchpersons gonna be doing?
Riddler's gimmick is pretty much scavenger hunts and escape rooms right? So what... set design, location scout, plumbing and electrical, carpentry, general construction, craft services for the work crews... After the clues have been hidden and the trap/escape room completed you get your paycheck and fuck off.
You watch TV or read the newspapers about the Riddler's scheme, go work some gig work until the Riddler breaks out of Arkham and needs folks to help with the next scavenger hunt/escape/trap room.
Probably gots lots funny stories and jokes and puns to keep things fun during break time.
GOOD choice