this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2024
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anakin-padme-2

anakin-padme-4

Oh who am I kidding; I'm still this face right now anakin-padme-2

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[–] Robert_Kennedy_Jr@hexbear.net 26 points 2 months ago (3 children)

I don't care about a 20 year development time, the kids are going to make the space sim woke and gay!

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 27 points 2 months ago (5 children)

Star Citizen's big spenders (according to visual evidence from the grift's own fundraising events and conventions) are divorce-flavored almost-entirely-white aging gamedads that are still stuck in the 90s.

And they're not getting any younger.

[–] hypercracker@hexbear.net 21 points 2 months ago (1 children)

putting minoxidil into the fire sprinkler tank like in blade

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] anaesidemus@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 11 points 2 months ago

@WhyEssEff@hexbear.net brings the best emojis, folks. The best. Believe me. Everyone's saying it more and more.

feast-1feast-2

[–] Acute_Engles@hexbear.net 18 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I would seamlessly fit into this image and not stand out but it still makes me laugh in a way i needed. Thanks

Edit not a single ponytail in sight maybe i am a different kind of cringe white guy

[–] Hexboare@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Child support?

Yeah I pay child support, for my real children, the Legatus 2953 package which is only $48,000 and includes 175 ships!

[–] KobaCumTribute@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

I actually knew a guy who bought an Idris among other stupid shit as like an explicit cynical move to just not have money for his ex wife to take.

[–] MaoTheLawn@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

RSI

the repetitive strain injury convention

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago

That's why were only hiring 65+ white racist boomers so you can have the ideologically purist racist slop around kiddo.

[–] SeekTheDeletion@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

when the game takes so long to make it goes through multiple generations of developers

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago

I am a star citizen dev, like my father and his father before him

[–] CthulhusIntern@hexbear.net 16 points 2 months ago (1 children)

See, this is why we need UlyssesT. There were very few Star Citizen posts while he was gone.

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 14 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I admit there isn't that much going on in Store Citizen kelly apart from the growing contradictions of less total users/spenders but the remaining spenders spending more and more each year.

That will continue to be interesting; I want to see how long that can last. markkks-juggalo

[–] Gorb@hexbear.net 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The peak of star citizen hate was like 4 years ago now when all the videos were coming out showing how fucked the company is. The projects so bad even the most dedicated haters got bored and moved on. Not me though, i remain

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Most of the remaining dunk videos are from jaded true believers now, the ones with crises of faith that are still sticking because of sunk-cost fallacy.

[–] danisth@hexbear.net 13 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Star Citizen shit makes me so mad. If a tiny fraction of what they’ve promised actually existed as a functional cohesive game it would probably be sick. When I first heard about SC I was obsessed with it, how could you not be? I know this is the oldest grift in vidya games, but at least Peter molyneux delivered a fun game, if it was a shadow of what was promised.

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The primary obstacle to Star Citizen actually coming out and doing even a fraction of what it promised to do was always Chris Roberts himself.

Freelancer wouldn't have launched at all if he wasn't booted out of that project after years of feature creep and micromanaging clownfuckery.

[–] Hexboare@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Freelancer was only in development for six years too (with Roberts for ~4 years)

At this point I think the only option would be to bin everything and start over

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Star Citizen could have been a decent game if it didn't feature creep itself year after year after, and had some compromises like instanced landing zones and none of that bedsheet wrinkling simulation shit.

It was still masturbatory space Roman fascism with 90s shopping mall characteristics as a setting, unless that was thrown out too (yes please).

[–] Hexboare@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Locking themselves into CryEngine was a particularly bazinga poison pill for the game

Like if they were absolutely dead set on an FPS engine, surely you'd try to licence something like PlanetSide 2's engine

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

The price a cult of personality pays is that whatever the cult of personality leader says is the cult's law.

Chris Roberts thought CryEngine looked epic. The "code whisperer" didn't know its limitations and didn't care. He told his underlings to make it work.

[–] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 2 points 2 months ago

PlanetSide 2's engine

Oof, I'd probably rather rebuild from an already existing engine (not CryEngine), which star citizen definitely had the money to do before it apparently just snorted it all. Elite Dangerous went backwards from starting with space shenanigans and gradually programming back to infantry scale stuff.

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)

but at least Peter molyneux delivered a fun game, if it was a shadow of what was promised.

I can't forgive Molyneux's smug enlightened centrist sermonizing on the Fable sequel that had an doomsday scenario that required a moderate amount of cruelty to the kingdom to win because of money requirements, and any attempt to raise money without an enlightened centrist amount of evil would just raise the bar of how much money has to be raised until you learn how to be the Adult In The Room that Makes The Hard Decisions and Gets Shit Done. centrist

[–] ItsPequod@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago

Fable 3 fumbled so fucking hard, it's honestly remarkable. Almost every vaguely fun feature from the earlier games is made tangibly worse, from emoting to leveling progress, to the story being absolute dogwater. Hell, I think the worst sin by far was "Wot if instead of a menu like a normal video game we made you load into a whole separate instanced location" with John the decrepit old boomer racist fucking Cleese as your butler.

Funnily enough, when I played through the one time I ever played it I managed to avoid the ending crises by being just so stupidly rich ahead of time and realistically by that point all the 'decisions' were made pretty moot. The sudden time-skips didn't bother at all because I just wanted shit to be over.

[–] Gorb@hexbear.net 13 points 2 months ago

Meshing meshing meshing my balls server ballsing. Interlinked

My balls interlinked

k-pain

[–] PKMKII@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago

Star Citizen is the ol’ reliable of vidya drama

[–] Des@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

ohhh yeah missed these updates

also 7days to die finally went to 1.0 wtf is the excuse of these guys?

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

also 7days to die finally went to 1.0 wtf is the excuse of these guys?

I think Chris Roberts figured out (or at least his handlers did) that bumblefucking around is more profitable long term than ever delivering anything that can be called a finished product.

[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 2 points 2 months ago

I found a YouTube link in your post. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy: