this post was submitted on 13 Oct 2024
1034 points (93.8% liked)

People Twitter

5086 readers
616 users here now

People tweeting stuff. We allow tweets from anyone.

RULES:

  1. Mark NSFW content.
  2. No doxxing people.
  3. Must be a tweet or similar
  4. No bullying.
  5. Be excellent to each other.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
(page 2) 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] dsilverz@thelemmy.club 22 points 4 days ago (2 children)

In my perspective (a lonely person generally accustomed with my loneliness), small talk doesn't seem to be the problem. The problem is the lack of people's interest in deep topics, such as the aforementioned nature of reality: people either don't have the needed patience, time, or both. People are so busy running through the survival game of the mundane existence that deep topics are left for their afterlives (if there's one), when human ideologies and need for survival cease to exist. Small talk is like "sorry I got no time to think about the ultimate question of life, universe and everything else, gotta go to my modern slavery where I'm not paid to think but to obey, bye!". Deep inside, seems like a fear of becoming lonely as those that, just like me, likes to think about the depths of the reality and breaking paradigms (for example, "shouldn't we discuss how existence is so fleetingly finite in the grand scheme of cosmos and how futile is to accumulate wealth and goods?" is a granted source of loneliness).

[–] InternetPerson@lemmings.world 7 points 4 days ago

The problem is the lack of people's interest in deep topics,

I'm not sure about that. I think small talk serves occasions where you might want to keep it polite as deeper topics tend to become emotionally loaded disputes.

For example, going to a bubble tea shop. Usually, you don't want to discuss the meaning of life with the shop keeper, but it may be a nice gesture to talk a bit about the small things in life. Small talk is a good way to share a pleasant conversation and appreciate each other.
Furthermore, small talk can serve as an opener to deeper topics if the occasion arises and everyone seems to be in the mood for such deeper topics.

Anyway, my wife and I are friends with the shop keeper now and we've talked about the weather, religions, vacations and how to raise children.

[–] Disgracefulone@discuss.online 9 points 4 days ago (5 children)

There's someone out there that would love talking about that stuff with you if you haven't already found them just so you know! ❤️

Everyone's got a person with a similar wave length as long as they don't settle before then!

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 3 days ago
[–] minorkeys@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago
[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 8 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Talking philosophy is small talk.

[–] ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net 7 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Person: Hey you having a good morning?

Me: Depends... What does it mean to be a good person?

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] pixelscript@lemm.ee 7 points 4 days ago

how do people who "hate small talk" plan on being in sustained meaningful relationships

That's the neat part--I don't!

[–] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 23 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (6 children)

Idk that I really do small talk OR do philosophical conversations with my partner but I'll let you judge. Here's the sort of things me and my partner say to each other throughout the day:

  • wanna play [whatever co-op we're into lately]? (Then several hours of strategy discussions)
  • did you eat all the chips again you FUCKER followed by BITCH WHAT IF I DID YOU ATE ALL THE OREOS???
  • If all dogs go to heaven do their people have to be there for it to be a dog heaven and does that mean hitler is in heaven because he had a dog?
  • miscellaneous bitching about our jobs
  • wanna fuck
  • the dog pissed in the elevator again it's your turn to go clean it
  • did you see the sweater I put the cat in?
  • Debates about whether or not a taco is a hot dog or vice versa
  • how many toys do you wanna get out for the fucking and more importantly how many are you willing to clean
  • that book you made me read is really melodramatic but I agree it's about black mold.
  • we should go visit the hot tub vs no it's too fucking cold vs that is the point of it being a HOT tub
  • wanna play cards against humanity with the cat
  • debates about who will hold the cat while we trim her claws
  • yelling at each other for being too loud while the other is sleeping and which offense is fundamentally more heinous (dayshifter vs nightshifter)
  • discussing the biopunk visuals in lexx and how they would have made all the butthole windows out of fabric
  • random nonsense words and noises like doing an entire karaoke bit but all the words are "doodoodoodoo doodley dooooot doo"
  • discussions about farscape's costuming department's extensive use of bondage gear
  • putting peanut butter on TOP of the dog's snout then filming her
  • what if we feel like we're seeing God when we're on mushrooms because the mushrooms ARE god and we're all just fundamentally here to feed them
  • blaming each other for the peanut butter thing to get the other person to clean it up
  • talking about weird internet personalities like chrischan or the tile patterns guy
  • calling each other old for stuff like heartburn after pizza or chronic injuries flaring up with the weather
load more comments (6 replies)
[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 19 points 5 days ago

My inability to carry even a basic conversation is just one of many reasons I have no plan to be in any kind of relationship, sustained or not, meaningful or not

[–] bestboyfriendintheworld@sh.itjust.works 20 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

You can talk about ideas on what to do in the bedroom or kitchen instead of the weather. My girlfriend and I talk about the nature of the universe and consciousness quite often.

[–] El_guapazo@lemmy.world 13 points 4 days ago

They seem ritualistic social interactions. Like some bird's courtship dance except there's no relationships interest. So it's just a burden that I didn't want to participate in unless I have a genuine friendship.

[–] deaf_fish@lemm.ee 3 points 3 days ago (3 children)

I wish I knew why small talk is important and why the example in the post is a problem. It would be helpful if someone could explain it.

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›