this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2024
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askchapo
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We demand a utopian future where one can stream in the morning, game in the afternoon, and podcast after dinner without ever becoming a streamer, gamer, or podcaster.
Tabletop gaming gulag. If you want your nerd shit, you're going to have to do it in person and be kind to the people you're playing with
Being caught being That Guy gets you sent to the SuperGulag where you paint historical wargaming troops (nothing roman/Byzantine or post Napoleon allowed) for the duration of your sentence
Edit: I forgot to mention they aren't allowed to paint anything Germanic/HRE related either.
if you paint Nazi symbols on them then you get sent to singular (not solitary) confinement where you have to finish a single miniature to leave (an impossible project)
I regret to inform you that you've forgotten to ban the crusades and the gulags are now full of people chanting "deus vult".
a ttrpg reeducation camp where to leave you have to successfully get through a campaign with a gm trained to punish bigots with pc death. the setting will be the forgotten realms and critiquing the inherent bigotry of that setting will be mandatory
You can catch me deliberately committing crimes (gaming) in order to be sent to the TTRPG reeducation camp, where not only will I not have to be the GM, but nobody will be able to flake on sessions.
i volunteer to be a prisoner-spy in order to aid ideological rectification from the inside (i've never managed to be in a consistent ttrpg group but it sounds nice)
Now I have actual time to play Battletech instead of just occasionally painting a lil robot
Damn I'd do everything in my power to avoid the TTRPG gulag since I think having to look up and/or memorize To-Hit tables is a fate worse than death
we solved that a long time ago. it's called thac0 and everyone hates it
They're gonna consume a lot of oven baked pizza and cheap beer at this gulag.
Depends on the game, the games I like? It's all good. The games I don't like? We hit them with the domain expansion
Defense of the Pancients
Death via boiling acid
I'm going to be sent to Alaska for hoarding my old childhood SNES.
Dick flattening
execution by firing squad. go outside, get some exercise
Death to America
They'll be dunked in The Ooze
Not a punishment... but a "cost".
Sure, play the game, spend 100 hours getting every unlockable and acheivement and master its game mechanics. Then you gotta spend 100 hours reading theory or working in whatever Civilian Conservation Corps thing is around.