this post was submitted on 09 Dec 2024
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chapotraphouse

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Death to America

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[–] SuperZutsuki@hexbear.net 36 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Even if he didn't intentionally get caught, he still serves as an example of what to do and not do for the next person.

Wear the same shit everyone else wears, cover your face, low tech getaway halal

Go out in public after photos have surfaced, STILL have the gun and fake IDs on you haram

[–] Enjoyer_of_Games@hexbear.net 16 points 1 month ago

Done in by the same thing that did in 99% of the population with covid. You don't take your mask off until you get home. Taking it off for just a quick moment is like thinking you can get away with opening a submarine door for just a second without it counting.

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

seriously.. at least draw over your eyebrows to make them unrecognizable and wear sunglasses and change the shape of your face

there have to be a dozen things he could have done to make it impossible to tell what he really looks like that he could easily undo later

[–] CyborgMarx@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)
  1. Giant nonprescription glasses and colored contacts
  2. Pigmentation makeup or makeup in general
  3. Dying your hair or growing it out and cutting it after the deed
  4. Cotton balls stuffed in your gums to change the outline of your jaw and jowls
  5. Height insoles
  6. Headphones to cover the shape of your ears or a hood (tho that carries risks in certain locales)
  7. Walk with a limp
  8. A fake mustache to hide your upper lip or a mask

If this really is the guy, he kinda did the bare minimum for not getting caught

[–] iheartmold@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

Put small pebbles in your shoes to change the gait of your walk.

[–] OprahsedCreature@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 month ago
  1. Ski goggles with mask and hood
[–] sisatici@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

Breaking the boycott haram

[–] ped_xing@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Were the gun and fake IDs really pivotal, though? He still would have the resemblance, the smell of not bathing properly for a few days and no alibi. I think he was fucked the moment somebody dropped the dime regardless.

[–] SuperZutsuki@hexbear.net 24 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This is why we need a drag queen CEO killer. Commit the crime in drag and it doesn't even matter if you show your face. No makeup and 5 days of beard growth and no one will ever know.

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

shaving my legs as we speak

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 34 points 1 month ago

Counterpoint: It's a different guy with brain scramblies and the Adjuster is sitting on a bench somewhere where there's no extradition

[–] mkultrawide@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago

Leave the gun, take the cannoli

--Machiavelli

[–] Bureaucrat@hexbear.net 5 points 1 month ago

Trust the plan