this post was submitted on 31 Dec 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] Earflap@reddthat.com 23 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (8 children)

Wait until anon discovers a hamburger with a glazed donut for a bun and the entire thing is deepfried.

[–] LodeMike 1 points 33 minutes ago

Where do I find this?

[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago (5 children)

served with a side drink of milkshake with double cream on it

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[–] radix@lemmy.world 155 points 4 days ago (4 children)

Wait 'til you see the child size soda.

It's 512 ounces, or roughly the size of a two-year old child, if the child were liquefied. It's a real bargain at $1.59.

[–] rockerface@lemm.ee 48 points 4 days ago

Straight from the orphan crushing machine. Delicious

[–] Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 40 points 4 days ago (8 children)

512oz = 15.14L. Literally soda in a size of a child.

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[–] rickyrigatoni@lemm.ee 30 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Malnourished european can not handle a real meal.

[–] xor@lemmy.dbzer0.com 46 points 3 days ago (1 children)

fun part is americans are fat AND malnourished….

[–] rickyrigatoni@lemm.ee 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Explain how we are malnourished when ONE burger contains EVERY food group. You can't.

[–] xor@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] rickyrigatoni@lemm.ee 15 points 3 days ago (3 children)

That's what we got flintstone gummies for bruh.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 5 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

flintstone gummies

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flintstones_Chewable_Vitamins

They feature vitamins in the shapes of the Flintstones characters: Fred Flintstone, Wilma Flintstone, Pebbles Flintstone, Barney Rubble, Betty Rubble, Bamm-Bamm Rubble, Dino, and The Great Gazoo.

For over twenty years, Betty was not included as one of the vitamins. However, after a grassroots campaign and the results of a Bayer telephone poll came in favor of including Betty, the character was added to the lineup in 1995, replacing the Flintstone car.

The !fuckcars@lemmy.world people should be using Betty as their mascot.

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[–] Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 85 points 4 days ago (49 children)

I'm currently vacationing in Japan and have slimmed down a lot in just a week of walking, eating smaller healthier meals, and taking the train everywhere. America has a truly fucked standard of living. I don't want to go back to driving and eating shitty oversized unhealthy meals while also tipping.

[–] Railing5132@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

Vacationing in Italy was the same - smaller, healthier meals, lots of walking - I felt great and didn't have the shits once on a 2 week trip. It's a daily thing at home.

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[–] NABDad@lemmy.world 50 points 4 days ago (10 children)

Anyone who looks at the U.S. and thinks it's a fucked up country because of the food just isn't paying attention.

[–] psud@aussie.zone 2 points 2 days ago

The food stands out. Like Australia has too many fat people too, but our restaurants don't cater to them like America's - don't try to feed everyone a meal suited to a 200kg man trying for 300.

[–] NickwithaC@lemmy.world 32 points 4 days ago (9 children)

It may not be the only issue but it is definitely on the list.

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[–] Rookwood@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 days ago

Most of the food comes from fast food along stroads. It is a core part of the problem. The education system is probably the root, but I wouldn't expect a tourist to understand that.

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[–] godot@lemmy.world 103 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (8 children)

Between 1975 and 2016, the prevalence of obesity in Europe rose 138%, with a 21% rise between 2006 and 2016. The prevalence of overweight rose by 51% between 1975 and 2016, and by 8% between 2006 and 2016. It is expected that by 2030, over half of Europe will live with obesity – up to 89% in some countries. No Member State is on track to reach the target of halting the rise in obesity by 2025.

https://www.eufic.org/en/healthy-living/article/europes-obesity-statistics-figures-trends-rates-by-country

The proliferation of unhealthy eating is a big problem for most of Europe, too. They’re on the same path as the US for mostly the same reasons, just a few steps back.

That said, if I’m going to be fat, I’d rather it be because of schnitzel the size of a dinner plate or cacio e pepe over a Monster Burger.

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[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 10 points 3 days ago (2 children)

They didn't give you a pack of cigarettes with your meal? How un-yurapeein!

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[–] superkret@feddit.org 73 points 4 days ago (1 children)

visit America
get shot
bystanders start clapping

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[–] LordWiggle@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

It's the gateway drug to insulin. Corn syrup infused fats, no vitamins or any other important stuff.

[–] Trantarius@lemmy.dbzer0.com 27 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Big food is kind of a marketing thing in America. Restaurants want to give their customers more " bang for their buck" (or at least appear to), but they don't want to lower prices. Instead, they increase portions. This has lead to a size arms race where every restaurant wants to claim they have the biggest food in town. This is especially the case for burger joints. It doesn't matter to the restaurant if customers eat all their food, since they pay for all of it either way. I'm guessing Americans are more culturally susceptible to this marketing tactic, since bigger-is-better is common here, and hence things have been taken further than in other countries.

This seems to be another case of someone throwing reason out the door for the sake of insulting Americans. There is no way you would be getting "shit eating grins" for ordering a kids meal. And if your large burgers are smaller than a kids meal, you either have very little size variation, or the small would be like a single bite.

[–] MoonMelon@lemmy.ml 12 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Yeah, that worker is one of two in the entire restaurant. She has to take your order plus the five behind you, the drive-thru orders, make fries, bag it all up, take your monkey, clean tables, make coffee, refill the ketchup/soda/milkshake/yogurt contraptions with their various bags of sugary goo, restock counters/tables with all the varied plastic and paper geegaws, take out the trash, stock the walk-in, clean the bathrooms somebody sprayed with liquid shit, then count out and get to her other job by 3pm so she can then do it all again tomorrow. She doesn't give a fuck what anyone orders, it's just a blur of colors and lower back pain.

If she makes a face it's probably the best she can do to fake a smile because you might be a secret shopper who is going to ding her points for not saying, "Welcome to McDonald's Home of the McFlurry™ now with DoubleStuff™ Oreo™, what can I get started for you today because It Just Tastes Better!!℠" with the proper amount of obsequiousness.

There's plenty of reasons to hate the hellscape, no reason for anon to invent some.

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[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago

Americans shop for calories per dollar.

Please don't look at why they do that, we're the best country ever!

[–] XTL@sopuli.xyz 69 points 4 days ago (10 children)

I’ll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda.

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[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 27 points 4 days ago (5 children)

I REALLY wish they would have went to Five Guys.

Guy 3/5: fills 32 ounce cup with fresh hot, salt slathered fries. Drops cup in a large bag. Takes another full scoop of the fries and throws them in the bag. Easily 4-5 potatoes worth.

The cup of fries should be 1300 calories, they easily put twice as many in. That's a daily food intake worth of calories for the side alone.

[–] Leate_Wonceslace@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

The calorie count is accurate for what they give you, not what fits in the cup. They just use a cup that's way too small to trick you into thinking they're giving you more than what you paid for.

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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Changing $12 for what is functionally agricultural waste product is so fucking funny.

Ground beef is what's left on the cow after all the choice bits have been carved off. The bun is so thick with preservatives most organisms literally can't eat it. The sauces are just colored corn syrup. The produce is bottom of the barrel.

This isn't food, it's industrial runoff. You'd eat better picking through the trash of a real grocery store.

[–] Jamablaya 1 points 2 days ago

Lol. You don't know shit about fuck. It's honestly a little amazing.

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[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 48 points 4 days ago (15 children)

I'm up in Canada and since the start of the pandemic I've stopped going to fast food places. But after things got back to normal, I thought why should I go back to ordering food at McD's .... as I thought of it more, I realized it didn't make any sense.

Fast food is basically unnutritious food made by underpaid workers who don't like their work ... the food doesn't do me any good and its too expensive .... I have to trust the underpaid employee didn't mess up my order ... I waste money by degrading my health only to spend more money to try to get back some good health

I realized it was cheaper in the long run of my life to not eat at these damned places.

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[–] RedAggroBest@lemmy.world 16 points 4 days ago

Falsified and homosexual. No Yuroopeens allowed

[–] Paradachshund 22 points 4 days ago (8 children)

It's interesting reading responses on this because I'm gathering a lot of Europeans/non-americans think that burgers are always fast food?

When an american thinks of a good burger I think most of us are picturing our favorite bar and grill's burger, not a chain fast food one.

Are burgers pretty much only at fast food chains in other countries?

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[–] Zozano@aussie.zone 4 points 3 days ago
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