this post was submitted on 29 May 2025
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The Onion

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[–] PanArab@lemm.ee 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If 5 million USD can buy you a US citizenship, why can’t I sell mine for 5 mill USD? I will gladly do so, and I bet I won’t be the only one.

Yeah, is there a sign up sheet?

[–] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 day ago

Didn’t this already happen with Elon “paying” people to vote Trump?

[–] spacecadet@lemm.ee 4 points 1 day ago

Good thing we live in a democratic republic that would prevent mob rule so this could never happen

[–] Reverendender@sh.itjust.works 84 points 3 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (4 children)
[–] LodeMike 25 points 3 days ago

Which wasn't even "paid out"

[–] joyjoy@lemm.ee 10 points 3 days ago

An egg. My kingdom for an egg!

[–] meco03211@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Worth more than $100 these days.

[–] Reverendender@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 days ago

Guaranteed sans Bird Flu!™️®️

[–] stinky@redlemmy.com 7 points 3 days ago

I didn't vote for him.

[–] ArchmageAzor@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago

The Americans already did, for the promise of cheap eggs and an ethnostate.

[–] Nublets@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

Still waiting on my gift card...

[–] DancingBear@midwest.social 2 points 1 day ago

Im totally going to egg some random guys house in the suburbs because of this news article, no wait eggs and beer… fine I’ll just get a forty ounce and the eggs

[–] tal 27 points 3 days ago (3 children)

a $100 certificate they could use to purchase a new Bluetooth speaker or couple Keurig coffee makers,” said Pew pollster Dana Felder, who

I do not for one minute believe that $100 is buying a couple of Keurig coffee makers, unless those guys are going ridiculously hard on the razor-and-blades model.

checks Amazon

Yeah. The least-expensive Keurig coffee maker on Amazon is $60:

https://www.amazon.com/Keurig-K-Mini-Single-Serve-Coffee/dp/B07GV2S1GS

It looks like they go up to $126.

Maybe a couple of Mr. Coffee coffeemakers.

[–] parad0x22@midwest.social 23 points 3 days ago (1 children)

This article was first posted in 2021 and has not been edited since. Inflation has been considerable in that time.

[–] tal 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Remember when things were....affordable?

[–] MangoCats@feddit.it 3 points 2 days ago

Not Keurig coffee makers.

[–] MangoCats@feddit.it 3 points 2 days ago

I do not for one minute believe that $100 is buying a couple of Keurig coffee makers

It's not, these are the promises, like cheap eggs, affordable groceries and $1.98/gallon gasoline.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

My ex and I scored 5 at the thrift for $5 each. I'll never understand paying retail, and especially for coffee makers. I did pay "full" price for my Amazon French press. Whatever.

[–] obvs@lemmy.world 20 points 3 days ago

Haha! You don't have a democracy to swap!

[–] Rakonat@lemmy.world 16 points 2 days ago

Bait was never this believable before.

[–] Jaybird@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago

They already did, and the gift card has also been spent...

[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Democracy? Lol. Can we trade in our plutocracy for anything?

[–] desktop_user@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

how does a dictatorship and a side of day old fries sound?

[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago

Apparently that sounds fucking fantastic to the average voter.

[–] tauren@lemm.ee 13 points 2 days ago

I mean, this is more or less what happened in November.

[–] rovingnothing29@lemmy.world 17 points 3 days ago

I ate this onion quite hard

[–] circuitfarmer@lemmy.sdf.org 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I mean, $100 bucks at Best Buy is like $35 at actual market prices. I'd need at least a $200 gift card.

[–] GenosseFlosse@feddit.org 6 points 2 days ago

That's maybe two 1.5m HDMI cables.

[–] TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee 5 points 2 days ago

the avg American wouldn't give a fuck, at all. they would shout "gimme that!" not even knowing what they were trading away, thinking it's "just some political bullshit".

[–] KulunkelBoom@lemm.ee 5 points 3 days ago

Sure... plus tax.

[–] melsaskca@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 days ago

I thought it would've been a Wal-Mart gift card.

[–] sqgl@beehaw.org 0 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Strange closing paragraph.

the highest they’d been since 1996 when 80% of Americans stated that they would live under an Islamic theocracy in exchange for a $50 gift card to Radio Shack.

[–] yournamehere@lemm.ee -1 points 2 days ago

not loving money more than life is so un-american