The Onion

4777 readers

1194 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago

MODERATORS

seahorse@midwest.social

pbrisgreat@midwest.social

212

Home Depot Introduces New 12-Foot-Tall Baby Jesus Skeleton (www.theonion.com)

submitted 1 year ago by Five@slrpnk.net to c/theonion@midwest.social

8 comments fedilink hide all child comments

top 8 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[–] ares35@kbin.social 24 points 1 year ago (1 children)

nails are in aisle 3, lumber is out back.

[–] Kata1yst@kbin.social 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Damn it, I really wanted my sacrilege fully pre-assembled.

Hopefully they have a set of fucking useless piece of shit contractors who can waste my goddamn time for months and go over budget.

[–] Alteon@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

My brother in Christ, you can pick up a hammer and saw at the same facility and do it yourself in a fraction of the time and money. YouTube will show you the way.

[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Those skeletons are really going to become the backbone of every holiday's decorations.

[–] otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yes please!

Although, the baby Jesus would've been better as an infant zombie, IMHO. 🤌🏼

[–] SomeAmateur@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago

Gotta save the zombie part for easter

[–] pdxfed@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Nailed it!

[–] mx_smith@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

This is so great, we have a house in the neighborhood that got one of those giant skeletons for Halloween several years ago and keeps it up all year while changing the decorations around it. It currently has a Santa hat.