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Donald Trump flubbed the last debate. His allies know it, his fundraisers know it—but that doesn’t mean they’re willing to admit it.

On Thursday, the Republican presidential nominee announced that he had decided not to debate Vice President Kamala Harris for a second time, writing in a lengthy rant on Truth Social that “THERE WILL BE NO THIRD DEBATE!” (Apparently he’s counting his debate against Joe Biden.)

But less than 24 hours after the major reversal, Trump’s team was already working to explain away why the country would be getting less of their candidate.

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[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 120 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Lol this is awesome

[–] Dagwood222@lemm.ee 64 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Not the first time he's run from a debate.

Back before the 2016 election Trump challenged Bernie Sanders to a debate. Bernie accepted and Trump had to backtrack.

[–] whostosay@lemmy.world 24 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I just wanna know how all the "tough guy/anti-snowflake" types all landed on the worlds most massive pussy/coward, and thought "here's our guy, he's a business man, the only job the whole world that carries the well known and somehow normalized intent to fuck you over no matter what for a dollar. He'll look out for my interests."

Most gullible turds speedrun any% world record.

[–] Dagwood222@lemm.ee 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Because he justifies their bad behavior.

[–] Regrettable_incident@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Also, now he's looking less and less like the winner he pretended to be, they're caught up in the sunk cost fallacy.

[–] Dagwood222@lemm.ee 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Unhappily, a certain number are probably going to go full domestic terrorist. Look at the people threatening Springfeild, Ohio because the residents all told the media that Trump was lying when he talked about the mobs of Haitian pet eaters. They closed down a couple of schools with bomb threats.

Well yeah. Remember the Jan 6 shit. That was genuinely scary. They can do much worse than bomb threats. America is fucked and I don't know how you fix this.

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[–] ATDA@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Fuck I would have payperviewed that shit.

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[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 64 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Ah ha ha ha! That's the funniest thing, most wonderful thing I've heard all week. Keep the GOP scrambling, keep them on the defensive. Brilliant!

[–] zephorah@lemm.ee 53 points 5 days ago (4 children)

He was so thrown off. Debate summary:

.

Kamala: This is a man easily led around by his ego by people like Putin and Kim Jong Un.

.

Trump: But immigrants. Democrats kill babies after they’re born.

.

Moderator: Sir, in none of the 50 states are they killing babies after they are born.

.

Trump: But immigrants. Kamala isn’t about law and order.

.

Kamala: I’ve locked people up. I’ll lock you up.

.

Trump: But immigrants. Kamala wants to take away your guns.

.

Kamala: I own a gun.

.

Moderator: Question Kamala doesn’t want to or can’t answer.

.

Kamala: Let me invite you to one of Trumps rallies. Where the crowd sizes are small and people start to leave out of boredom.

.

Trump: Takes bait, thus proving Kamala’s opening remark.

.

Also Trump: But immigrants. They’re eating the cats and dogs.

.

Moderator: Sir, spoiler alert, they’re not eating the cats and dogs. Per the mayor or Springfield, there are no reports of missing animals.

.

Trump, looking every one of his 78 years: But immigrants. They’re eating the cats and dogs. I saw it on the television.

.

Kamala: … 🙄😮😧🙄😃😄🙄…

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Moderator: Sir, they’re not eating the cats and dogs.

.

Trump, after debate: I clearly won. The only reason they want another debate is because they lost, that’s what losers do, ask for a rematch.

.

Also, there’s a school of thought out there that Trump has a little crush on Kamala. Creepy, but credible. They’re citing a prior 9/11 memorial get together where you see him on camera more or less asking for an introduction to her. If it’s true, she knows. She’s been gorgeous her whole life, has navigated that garbage for ~45yrs now. She knows. If it’s there she knows. And she stepped into his personal bubble to shake hands at the very start. He was a little startled. If he is indeed crushing, that would set a guy like Trump back on his heels even more so than the usual. He doesn’t even have a shitty little nickname for her, why? Paints the crowd size/bored dig in a new light as well.

That and she had moderate conservative answers for everything. He didn’t know how to debate that.

[–] Regrettable_incident@lemmy.world 11 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Yeah the handshake thing was a power move. I feel like I saw a tiny hesitation before she stepped up to him, probably because you are right about him, she's a smart woman and has to find him repulsive. But yeah, that handshake put him on the defensive right from the start. And when he started on about people eating cats she seemed honestly amused, which was far more effective than any rebuttal.

[–] frunch@lemmy.world 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Omg imagine if she did that quick pull trump was doing for a while there? That douche-ey "power move" where he'd begin with a regular handshake then suddenly yank the other person toward him?!? I will always remember that showdown with Trudeau where Trudeau actually prepped with a stance and everything when it came time to shake trump's hand... And he did not get pulled when donnie tried his cute little stunt, lol

Oh yeah, I'd forgotten about how Trudeau turned that shit around on trump. Class.

[–] Badeendje@lemmy.world 9 points 4 days ago

They will knock over the pieces, shit on the board and strut around like they won.

[–] Pretzilla@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

Re: crushing on her ; yep, he admitted it directly - saying she is very attractive and comparing her looks to Melania

He then couched it by saying he is 'prettier'

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Also, there’s a school of thought out there that Trump has a little crush on Kamala. Creepy, but credible. They’re citing a prior 9/11 memorial get together where you see him on camera more or less asking for an introduction to her.

Lol if this is true, its one of the most incredible things I've ever heard hahahaha...

My issues is that I can't even imagine someone as narcissistic as Trump having a "crush" on anyone but himself (or perhaps in the very short term, the last person that buttered him up).

I don't think he has crushes, I think he has things he wants - and for him some of those 'things' are women. At least he didn't try to grab her by the pussy. He's such a malignant little fuck.

[–] fox2263@lemmy.world 34 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Donald Trump “won” against Biden. Donald Trump wanted to debate him again.

Donald Trump “won” against Harris. Donald Trump says only the losers want a rematch.

[–] psycho_driver@lemmy.world 13 points 4 days ago (4 children)

Donald Trump “won” against Biden. Donald Trump wanted to debate him again.

The American people lost that debate.

[–] Badeendje@lemmy.world 23 points 4 days ago (1 children)

No.. it was the turning point to move to Harris. So in hindsight something good came of it, no?

Yeah. The change was necessary. I'm not sure the Dems had a real chance with Biden. Even with Harris the polls look like a toss up. Harris seems like a huge improvement over Biden but trump still has his legions of idiot voters. And I gotta say, huge respect for Biden for seeing the way the winds of change were blowing and deciding to step back for the sake of the country. Can you imagine trump having that sort of humility and patriotism? Trump couldn't even spell humility.

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[–] Chickenstalker@lemmy.world 38 points 5 days ago (5 children)

Simply run the debate but with Kamala talking to a Trump cardboard cut out.

[–] fuzzywombat@lemmy.world 23 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

The cardboard cut out would actually do better than Trump. It wouldn't get baited into talking about crowd size and then babbling conspiracy theory about some migrant eating dogs and cats.

[–] kautau@lemmy.world 15 points 5 days ago

Honestly the dems hosting a “mock debate” like this would be incredible. Release it as a YouTube video comedy partnership or something. Even better if has a great Donald Trump impersonator

[–] I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

No. That's on par with Clint Eastwood yelling at an empty chair. It just comes off looking pathetic.

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[–] NegativeLookBehind@lemmy.world 18 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Let it be known that dear leader has backed down from a debate with…

gasps

A black woman

[–] ATDA@lemmy.world 11 points 4 days ago

Trump giving some tiny dick, tiny rally energy there.

[–] VubDapple@lemmy.world 29 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled. Yes, brave Sir Donald turned about And gallantly, he chickened out. Bravely taking to his feet, He beat a very brave retreat, Bravest of the brave, Sir Donald.

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[–] Glytch@lemmy.world 16 points 4 days ago

This puts me in the mood for orange chicken.

[–] EleventhHour@lemmy.world 24 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Donald Trump flubbed the last debate.

Well that’s certainly one of the more generous renditions of the debate I’ve heard, lol— most everyone else describes it as somewhere between an “evisceration” and a “disembowelment”.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–] billiam0202@lemmy.world 29 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Kamala spanked Trump so hard, he owes her $130,000.

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 10 points 4 days ago

he's such a pussy; he's probably trying to grab himself right now

[–] FunderPants@lemmy.ca 20 points 5 days ago

MAGA exists to serve Trump, Trump serves himself. There are no surprises here.

[–] HubertManne@moist.catsweat.com 19 points 5 days ago (1 children)

When you find yourself in danger, When you're threatened by a stranger, When it looks like you will take a lickin', (puk, puk, puk, puk) There is someone waiting, Who will hurry up and rescue you, Just Call for trumpin Chicken! (puk ack!)

[–] Dagwood222@lemm.ee 7 points 5 days ago

I loved that show...

Here's the full version of the song.

https://youtu.be/XtzGa-2LBYI

Bonus

https://youtu.be/lJ9UYYDWI18

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 15 points 5 days ago
[–] simplejack@lemmy.world 13 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Trump totally would’ve won that debate if the moderator didn’t fact check immigrants eating Ohio cats.

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 15 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Don't forget post birth ~~abortions~~ executions

[–] zephorah@lemm.ee 10 points 5 days ago (6 children)

If he’d just fact check the statistics by, idk, maybe talking to medical personnel, he’d know the late term “abortion” statistics are stillbirth removal. The procedure used to do a stillbirth removal: abortion. That’s where the confusion comes in. Removal of the fetus for any reason is an abortion. Statistics don’t document the details on the procedure.

So he’s already talking crazy. And then he’s saying they’re executing infants after birth. What is that? How do you even get to that place that those words are allowed to earnestly spill from your mouth?

[–] frezik@midwest.social 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I'm just trying to imagine a person who goes through 8 months of pregnancy and then decides they don't want it. If I'm really reaching for something, I have heard from a few women who love the hormone cocktail they get from pregnancy, but I doubt even they would go that far.

The people who have third trimester abortions aren't doing it for fun, or even because they have a real choice.

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[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 4 points 5 days ago

Or if his small crowds that leave early weren't brought up

[–] Rapidcreek@lemmy.world 13 points 5 days ago

The debate results may be profound. Saw long lines waiting at the large Republican enclave of the Villages in Florida. They were waiting for Doug Emhoff, the second gentleman, for a meet and greet.

[–] JeeBaiChow@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago

Maybe he doesn't want to do it again because she pretty much cleaned his clock. Call him for the coward he is.

[–] N0body@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 5 days ago

From the makers of Trump Steaks comes Trump Chicken. Made from the most cowardly of chickens.

They were publicly spanked and humiliated, then they ran away while clucking that they actually won to anyone who is still listening to their delusional bullshit. Fortunately, the chickens were easily baited and walked right into the slaughterhouse.

[–] nutsack@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

if he performed poorly, a second debate could only help him, right? unless he performs worse

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