just did me a huge solid and permanently banned my account with no warning. I cannot even recover the account. Thanks for the push I needed to never go back to that shithole.
traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns
Welcome to /c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns, an anti-capitalist meme community for transgender and gender diverse people.
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Please follow the Hexbear Code of Conduct
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Selfies are not permitted for the personal safety of users.
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No personal identifying information may be posted or commented.
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Stay on topic (trans/gender stuff).
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Bring a trans friend!
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Any image post that gets 200 upvotes with "banner" or "rule 6" in the title becomes the new banner.
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Posts about dysphoria/trauma/transphobia should be NSFW tagged for community health purposes.
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When made outside of NSFW tagged posts, comments about dysphoria/traumatic/transphobic material should be spoiler tagged.
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Arguing in favor of transmedicalism is unacceptable. This is an inclusive and intersectional community.
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While this is mostly a meme community, we allow most trans related posts as we grow the trans community on the fediverse.
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Remember to report rulebreaking posts, don't assume someone else has already done it!
Matrix Group Chat:
Suggested Matrix Client: Cinny
https://rentry.co/tracha (Includes rules and invite link)
WEBRINGS:
๐ณ๏ธโโง๏ธ Transmasculine Pride Ring ๐ณ๏ธโโง๏ธ
โฌ ๏ธ Left ๐ณ๏ธโโง๏ธ๐ณ๏ธโ๐ Be Crime Do Gay Webring ๐ณ๏ธโโง๏ธ๐ณ๏ธโ๐ Right โก๏ธ
transphobia is some bullshit. i thought everyone liked pretty girls but so many people seem dead set on stopping me from becoming one? what gives?
::: spoiler mental health, downer, ramble, reflection Im not doing to well. Im not really a person. Im a mirror. I reflect the person Im talking to. Its why groups are hard for me. I become who Im interacting with. Or i become what they want me to be. I dont like it. I dont like being around men, because i reflect and become them. Im not a boy. Im a girl. I dont want to reflect and become them.
I love everyone around me. I mirror them, then i love them. Because if i love them then its kinda like loving myself. When I want love and care i provide love and care to others. I hope that they will give me love and care. If i can make them happy they can make me happy. If i love them hard enough then i will feel loved. If i am them, and i love them, then i love myself. Thats not how it works. But i keep pretending it is. Im not them. I want to stop being a mirror. I want to love myself. But how can I if I dont know who i am?
I want to want things. Im afraid of it. If im someone else, i can stop being them and be a different person when im rejected and discarded. I can seperate everything out. Compartmentalize. Im very good at compartmentalizing. What if what i want is wrong? Stupid? Poor taste? Hurtful? Insulting? I want to want things. I want to want. I do want. At least a little. I want faery lights strung in my room. I want nice bedding thats cute and pink and wonderful. I want the things I didnt get to have growing up. It all costs money. I have no income. I cant justify the expenses.
I cant even justify lazer. It would bring me relief. It would make things better. But i cant justify it. I should justify it. But i cant. I tell myself its too much, ive made it this far with visible shadow every day, ive made it this far bleeding from my face whenever I shave. So whats one more day? Just one more day. One more. No tomorrow, just today. One more day. One more. Only one. If i cant justify fixing my face, how can I justify faery lights? Or nice bedding? Or cute pillows?
I want other things sometimes too i guess. But those arent worthwhile, they dont have emotional value. Theyre fun, but dont carry weight in my heart. Theres a difference. I want to want from my heart. From my emotional center. Not from activity. Not from analytics. From my heart.
Activity is so much, but its just a way to avoid talking to people. I want to want things because wanting is an aspect of being a person. I want to go here. I want to eat this. I want to talk to you. I want to play this game. I want. The wanting is the core of movement through life. I dont want, so i dont move.
I want to be vulnerable with someone. Share my entirety with them. My physical mental and emotional self. But i dont know who that self is. How can I share something with someone when I dont know what it is? Its not a box I can hand to them. Its abstract thoughts and feelings.
I want faith and hope in the future. I want to know that it will all be ok, i will be ok, my family and friends will be ok, we will be happy.
I want a happily ever after. I hate that we grow up with that narrative ending. It doesnt exist. But i want it so badly. I want to not have to worry and just be happy. I want my story to end, and end with a "happily ever after". I dont want to write anymore. The book has no more plot points, no more movement. Its been stagnant for so long, and will not move further. I want to stop writing my story. I want it to be over. I just want to write "happily ever after" and thats it, its done, period. End of sentence. End of chapter. End of book. End of series. End of story. ๐ฃ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐๐ท๐ญ
Cursed with my voice ๐
I'm so sick of having no motivation not gonna lie
drugs
tried adderall for the first time, definitely feeling better now :3
not sure if I should spoiler. What should I even write as spoiler? Weird... existential moment?
I've had these weird moments where I have some existential moment where I go "wait all of this is real, this is reality" and my perspective...shifts? Into 3D. Its quite a surreal moment. What's your surreal/existential moments?
Debasing myself at the feet of the queer ND-friendly hairdresser like "I'm sorry it's such a mess my mother never taught me hair care "
Cis people are so weird. One of my housemates said that she is getting rid of her black jeans because they're out of fashion, even though she still likes some of them. She doesn't want to be seen wearing clothes that aren't trendy.
What a boring way to approach self-expression. You just want to look like everyone else? You just want to go with what's popular instead of what you personally like?
Trans/gnc people are sooo much better at fashion
Just made an appointment to get my ears pierced. This will be my first piercing, and I'm honestly surprised I was against it for as long as I was. Can't wait to be able to wear earrings
Every now and again I go back and listen to the โFind a Petโ song from mlp.
Idk why.
after finally coming back to lemmy and seeing that dredge tank post i checked the comm and theres literally a guy calling me transphobic talking about a comment i made 6 or 7 months ago from a lemmy.ml account i used to use calling someone out for being a weird chaser and being gross towards trans women which the person responded to by saying their partner is a femboy so theyre absolved from all blame
the average lemmy user is literally this:
The lady at the Visa office said I look no older than 21 when she saw my age.
idk how much of that was just flattery.
She also called my hair beautiful.
Maybe she was just being nice because she could tell I was trans.
guy at the convenience store gave me a MASSIVE eyebrow raise when i bought some booze earlier. it's working :))))
See a cute looking women who is too old for me once, compliment her, then we part ways forever...
HRT: I will help you get more in touch with your body
My body: GAG REFLEX
Shaving my whole body just as it starts getting cold out might have been a mistake
took two whole months but am finally starting to feel somewhat functional. beyond only being able to sleep 3 hours a night that is
My sweet gay lil son Curly likes playing with dolls
(that's ok, and we like that! We like that. Many people are saying their cats are gay and we like that, I will say that. )
I keep waking up normally but quickly sliding into the most foul fucking moods ever. Maybe it's just hormonal but Idk, should I stop taking my gabapentin or something?
bit of body and bottom dysphoria, tucking
Concerned about getting tucking panties because I don't really have hips yet, and the circumference of my waist is still several inches larger than my hips.
Could getting women's shapewear help for both? Like would it help with tucking and be able to tone down my stomache?
Reading a genderbent isekai and going "god I wish that happened to me"
Hey... Wait a minute
Uh I don't wanna go on Letterboxd anymore. Every time a movie has even the slightest whiff of the gays in its undertones, people go absolutely feral, as if Interview with the Vampire is actually good. I get it, right, but can we hold ourselves to slightly higher standards than that? I'm not against people enjoying things, I just dunno y'know? I wish I saw what they saw in stuff like Nightmare on Elm Street 2.
Also my feet hurt I wish I was watching movies about scary transgender autistic dykes!!!!!!!
I've been lifting every other day for almost a week now. This fucking slaps, not gonna lie. I did a bit more than usual today, and I don't feel wrecked. I am gonna become superpowered.
thought i had a free night but it turns out i have a ttrpg thing tonight... i want to sit and rot in my room but instead i have to go have fun ๐
She's my best friends doggirl
She's my best friends doggirlfriend
And she use to be mine
more reason to clean up my room: i can't find my pajama pants that have the cute sunflower pattern on them. i love them even if they don't have pockets
EDIT: nvm found them