this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2024
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[–] DessertStorms@kbin.social 183 points 2 years ago (5 children)

Pro tip: while DNA doesn't last long in urine, why take the risk, when significantly stinkier animal urines for hunting and/or deterrent purposes exist? RollSafeMeme.jpg

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 74 points 2 years ago (5 children)

I hear you can buy large quantities of super stinky fox urine pretty cheaply online from hunting supplies vendors..

[–] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 53 points 2 years ago (5 children)

wouldnt this add the risk that one's online purchase history could potentially be discovered and used against you as evidence?

[–] tryitout@infosec.pub 93 points 2 years ago (3 children)

Correct. The safest option is extracting it yourself directly from the fox. This also protects against man in the middle attacks.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 23 points 2 years ago

From what I’ve seen in furry porn, foxes are the sexiest animals too.

[–] crawancon@lemm.ee 14 points 2 years ago

"it's also hot."

/Paris Hilton twirling hair, snapping bubble gum.

[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 12 points 2 years ago

Don't listen to this! It doesn't work.

I found a fox, then extracted urine from the man between me and the fox. He still attacked me.

[–] BottleOfAlkahest@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago

It's used to deter pests so just spray some around your property and report the rest stolen.

[–] DessertStorms@kbin.social 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Yeah, I'd say if you have anywhere local that would sell it, buy there with cash if you can, otherwise if you're having to buy online try to make your order as least suspicious as you can..

[–] name_NULL111653@pawb.social 14 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

NOT locally... As soon as cops get a match on what type of urine was used and know there's a hunting vendor in town that sells it, they're absolutely going to ask to see cameras if they're seriously investigating for vandalism charges. Drive far away to get it. Far. Away. Then keep in your house, they can't search your garage without a warrant.

This is not legal advice. Do not attempt this in any way shape or form. The author of this hypothetical, fictional scenario is in no way responsible for actions taken based on this message.

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[–] Neato@ttrpg.network 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Why do hunters buy fox urine? Does it attract prey animals?

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 22 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Seems it's not used by hunters but rather to repel pests. Sorta like Ted Cruz, but pests in stead of humans.

[–] Infynis@midwest.social 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Unfortunately, if it attracts predators, it would likely have the same effect on Ted Cruz

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago

It already would anyway, since he's sexually attracted to animal urine in general.

I see no problem with luring an amorous Ted Cruz towards pissed off armed cops, though. That's what we in the trade call a twofer 😉

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[–] Coreidan@lemmy.world 15 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Only a newb would use fresh urine. The trick is storing it in a jug for awhile to let it ferment and get super stinky. Let it sit in the sun for a few days.

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 12 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Do it while it is in the tank of the watergun, so you don't get the smell while loading it

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[–] Squirrel@thelemmy.club 15 points 2 years ago

My wife got some deer repellent stuff with "putrified egg" in it that I would highly recommend for this purpose.

[–] GroundedGator@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

Also super soakers are way too conspicuous. Animal urine in a dollar store squirt gun is perfect. Animal urine actually requires less fluid to be effective.

Some cheap perfume would also do in a pinch, or essential oils mixed with cooking oil.

[–] SpunkyMcGoo@lemmy.world 83 points 2 years ago (4 children)

this smells like a honeypot tbh

[–] thesporkeffect@lemmy.world 107 points 2 years ago (1 children)

The police are desperate for fresh urine and will go to any lengths to obtain it

[–] atomicorange@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)

They could have just asked! I’ll happily piss in any cop car, free of charge.

I'd even give them a Chicago Sunroof

[–] xantoxis@lemmy.world 36 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I think it's actually a post by a satire account intended to convince people to try it. There are some tells, like how many details are included about how you do it and the damage it causes.

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[–] euphoric_cat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 32 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

I assure you I am the furthest from a fed, I genuinely fucking despise any kind of figure with higher power, and will go out of my way to make it as hard as (reasonably) possible for them to track me or gain evidence for any crime they want to push on me because I was "in the area according to google maps data" or whatever other bullshit they think of these days

[–] orsetto@lemmy.dbzer0.com 39 points 2 years ago

That's what a fed in your position would say.

[–] THEMASTERMIND@feddit.ch 13 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] cupcakezealot@lemmy.blahaj.zone 55 points 2 years ago (1 children)

any parent knows if you don't want someone to do something you always say the opposite of what you mean

classic rookie parenting mistake

[–] Infynis@midwest.social 17 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

Damn, the cops have a piss fetish!

[–] Etterra@lemmy.world 28 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Have you never heard of the Streisand effect? Because you will now.

[–] I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Have you ever heard of satire accounts? You can't possibly think this is real.

[–] jaschen@lemm.ee 13 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Yea, I'm so sure Akron Police Deportarment is the official account and not a satire account 🙄

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[–] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 2 years ago (1 children)

196 meetup in Akron it is, then

[–] euphoric_cat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 points 2 years ago (1 children)

my state here in australia is way too corrupt, I need some of that assistance 🤭🫡

196 world tour it is, then!

[–] Pilgrim@beehaw.org 20 points 2 years ago (1 children)

sounds like Robert Evans finally got Super soaker Full of Piss off the ground

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[–] kworpy@lemm.ee 20 points 2 years ago (1 children)

hinders the Police's ability to use that vehicle and protect the community

We're the ones protecting the community from you filthy pigs

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 2 years ago

Stop insulting pigs like that. They are cute and intelligent animals.

[–] EdibleFriend@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago

Absolutely never crossed my mind to do something like this. Until I saw this post.

[–] Emi621@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)
[–] littletranspunk@lemmus.org 8 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

Find and replace:

Find: "do not" replace: ""

Find: "stop" replace: ""

Find: "ing" replace: ""

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[–] outer_spec@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 2 years ago

Literally 1984

[–] Turun@feddit.de 7 points 2 years ago

More like "apolicecruser rule", lol

[–] einlander@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago (5 children)

Got to freeze the urine into ice cubes so after you toss it in, it takes time for it to melt and you're no longer on the scene. Just need a cup from a fast food place. No super soaker involved. And you can just spill everything out the cup if things get hot.

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